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Life can be a Pain

Life can be a Pain

Hi @BlueBay@Zoe7@Former-Member@Faith-and-Hope@utopia@oceangirl@TAB@Shaz51@PeppiPatty

I know there are more people I could tag but maybe I will think them up as I go along - actually I already have

I think I need my own thread - mostly my problem is chronic pain syndrome - I damaged my spine with the sporting excesses of my youth - a long time ago now - and I managed to rearrange it when I fell of my pushbike in a wind storm nearly 22 years ago and that seems a long time ago now but there is nothing they can do except treat the pain - and I do have Section 8 medication and I see a pain specialist

And the pain has been worse lately and wears me down and I get fed up and very tired -

I have issues with my mother as well - and although she died 2 years ago I still have bad times now and again - she was abusive and as well as I know myself and her this can get to me at times - and this is another reason I opened my own thread

Then there is TS - my Toxic Sister - she was under my skin for a while but not at the moment

So yesterday I felt so bad when I went to see the doctor about my back pain - and my pain specialist has cut my medication back several times over the last few years and she has gone too far - and I started to tell my doctor - yes - I cope with the pain better since my mother died - but it's driving me crackers atm and so are the memories of my mother

So that's it for now - I have had trouble opening this thread for some reason but now I have - I will run my own story - I would like to think I don't need to but yes - I do

You are all such wonderful supportive people - you are my soft place to land - that is so true

And anyone I have missed I will tag as I go along

Lots of hugs everyone

Dec

5211 replies

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In response to: Life can be a Pain

Re: Life can be a Pain

Hi @Decadian

@was just thinking about you. Sending you hugs ❤️❤️

In response to: Life can be a Pain

Re: Life can be a Pain

@Zoe7@BlueBay@Former-Member@outlander@utopia

Many thanks for your best wishes yesterday - and for the pictures - it is a wonderful feeling to have this support

I survived - slightly wonky turned into totally trashed by late afternoon - I really can't imagine how watching TV all day could make me feel better but at least I am still here and my sense of proportion is intact - aaaaaahhh - awwwwwww - sometimes I feel the sky is falling and other times I know it but I am here today - headachey and I have been busy doing yesterday's chores - I have left my passport papers to deal with next week - I can always fast-track the whole issue - I have an expired passport so it can't be that hard -

Enough - I am catching up with myself today and my grand-daughter is having exploratory surgery tomorrow and my daughter is on a list hoping to get to see her surgeon earlier - I have had good luck with those lists myself but this surgeon is very popular apparently - which is good - and I haven't heard anything from my cousin though I am reading his blog - no news there

And I have a headache which I know is something to do with tooth-grinding and that is enough complaining -

Thanks everyone for your support - it's amazing how all of this is happening at the same time but I guess that happens - and all the other stuff that went on seems like fluff with all these heavier issues - I guess I am used to attending to things and I will go on doing that - taking a day of to do nothing except clean up ants is okay

Enough - nothing is ever so bad it can't get worse

Dec

I know how to care for myself

In response to: Re: Life can be a Pain

Re: Life can be a Pain

Oh @Owlunar, hang in there 🌸💕

In response to: Re: Life can be a Pain

Re: Life can be a Pain

Taking care of yourself is a priority @Owlunar so I am pleased to hear you are doing that. You are right that there are things that can wait while you are feeling like this so an easy day is a great idea. Hugs Dec

In response to: Re: Life can be a Pain

Re: Life can be a Pain

In response to: Re: Life can be a Pain

Re: Life can be a Pain

hello @Owlunar

Sorry that I have not replied sooner..

respect how much that you are dealing with @Owlunar

that would have been so extremely harrowing that day...I won't even mention which one...you know...

You probably were running on auto pilot for much of it..

so there will be leaks of emotions..triggers...flashbacks...

You do have ongoing support on here though..

I actually spent a couple of hours reading back from the beginning of this thread...

I was totally confused why you were posting as @Decadian as well as @Owlunar

I am struggling again at the moment...

Pleased to read that you have some information about your granddaughter situation and hopefully more soon about your daughter...

I cannot find the words at the moment and feel better to leave you with those who can...

You are a very strong lady....believe in yourself....at the same time remind yourself that you are allowed to feel whatever it is that you are feeling...

❤

In response to: Re: Life can be a Pain

Re: Life can be a Pain

@Owlunar thinking of you 🌸

my girls birthday month, tomorrow is confirmation at church - people don’t understand how painful it is for me to watch their teenage girls go through the milestones. I avoid kids now. Don’t think I was the good mum I thought I was either. It’s all such a crock! Know you know but don’t wanna burden you. I’ll be fine.

Hope this weekend is better for you than last. What have you been up to?

I went on road trip up Blue Mountains and back. Was amazing. 🏞

Hiya @Sophia xox

In response to: Re: Life can be a Pain

Re: Life can be a Pain

thinking of you both @Owlunar @Former-Member

Sophia

In response to: Re: Life can be a Pain

Re: Life can be a Pain

In response to: Re: Life can be a Pain

Re: Life can be a Pain

Hi @Former-Member@Sophia1@Zoe7@BlueBay@utopia

The things that are going on in my life right now are common to everyone I am sure - it's just that they are happening all at once and that could be unusual -

Today I have a migraine - my head feels really fragile on the left side - and I have taken some medication for it but I am seeing my doctor this afternoon as usual - I am sure he will give me something to help.

Everything else will happen as I go along - I haven't done much but tidy up around here over the weekend - ordinary chores - leaving everything until this week - and I started on a couple of things and I am waiting for return phone calls and feel tired of all of this - there is a temptation to let it all go but I am not inclined to do that - and I can hardly believe all the bitzpiecez of ordinary life that are needing attention right now - from other people's mistakes with my services - and it feels like a puzzle I am doing in the dark with my hands tied -

I will be okay - I will always be okay - many years ago now things were really dark and with my reactive depression I couldn't manage - didn't manage - but I learned then that it all comes to pass and I can sit it out and I will sit it out - I will deal with all I have in front of me

But I am tired -

Okay - this is the good news - my grand-daughter had her operation on Friday - I texted with her on Saturday and she was sore but looking forward to recovering. My daughter has a couple of weeks to go before her appointment with her surgeon and is hoping that there will be a cancelation and I haven't heard any more about my uncle though I am communicating with my cousin on Facebook and in his blog - I am sure he will tell me when things occur - there is a strong need for privacy there

And I will be okay - as rotten as I feel - I know time passes - it's just unpleasant - things were so much worse 30+ years ago in the past

Dec

And sorry - as much as I care I am not much good to anyone right now

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