Life can be a Pain

everything adds up @Owlunar even the small stuff makes it into the bigger picture so i hope things do settle down for you esp the pain. it sounds like the balls in your court though with the pain. people are helping which is really good. your plans for a social life sounds really good to, i hope somehwere local has something you can join in

yeh loosing the job was hard and has given me more thinking tim which isnt good considering i was in hospital but i dont want that job. being a carer is enough. now i have a bit more me time and can maybe study again when i can think better

Hello @Owlunar, been thinking of you today

hope you are ok my friend

I have arthritis that keeps moving around the body giving me lots of aches and pains , finding out that it it from my kidney disease where instead of all the toxic going into the toilet , it is going back into the body , so when the urea acid and the creatinine goes to high it affects your body , muscles, ect

sending you hugs my friend

Hi @Shaz51

I'm sorry you have all these toxins - creatinine - stays in your body and gives you so much pain - you have enough in your life indeed without your own body giving you strife

Would you consider a transplant? I would happily be a donor if someone could use a kidney and that person was important to me - unlikely to ever be the case and I am a registered organ donor

Yet when I think about it myself I don't feel I would be an organ recipient - it has to be an individual and considered choice for donor and recipient - and not an easy choice either - unless we have passed on and are done with our organs

I haven't been feeling all that well - I have been walking properly for the first time for however long - my right knee will probably always be stiff with the arthritis I am prone to - but since my arthroscopy I am walking properly and this is causing pain in my hip - probably bursitis - and tomorrow I am having an ultrasound -

I guess you know the feeling and ask yourself if what you have already had isn't really enough - getting older is far more than just a number

Thanks for the call-out - I had a lot on my mind also - about my toxic sister and my rellies who are ill and I saw my psychologist today and yes - it is a big deal for me to take things into my own hands and fly interstate and let my rellies know I am there and I want to see them - I have chosen to be alone for so long now - having been pushed away from the family - it's a common story here - but I have learned to prefer it - I have a history of non-confrontation and prefer my life alone but ah yeah - this is the really tough bit coming up

My therapist wants me to write something about my sister - ahhhhhhhhhhhhh - I can do without her but maybe I have to establish relationships with other members of my extended family so I will hear with the oldies die off rather than not hear because my sister doesn't tell me - I haven'f figured that out yet

So regardless - I am sorry your kidney is not functioning enough to keep you healthy and hope that maybe dialysis can help - or something can help - I have orthopaedic problems and I can assure you that I prefer the devil I know - maybe you get that idea - I hope something works for you

Thanks Shaz

Dec

Thanks @outlander

I haven't looked around yet to see what other people have been doing over the last few days - I do become very introspective at times and find my life goes on whether I get my computer out or not

Boredom is not my problem - I have a short story about my epic moment of boredom during a philosophy lecture when I had done all the reading the lecturer suggested the previous week and all he did was tell us what we should have read - sheesh - that was a tough hour - the chair I was on got harder and harder -

But now - I am pretty busy and think a whole lot and I find I have been thinking about my sister too much - and I read my previous post and what I wrote about her there is pretty much enough - make other connections in my family - good solution - but not that easy either

I think of you though

Dec

sending you lots of tender hugs @Owlunar

thankyou the specialist says I am a long way from going on the kidney Dialosis

how are you today xoxo

Hi @Shaz51@outlander@Faith-and-Hope@utopia@Former-Member@Adge

I had an ultrasound on my hip today and the results - I have bursitis in my hip and next week I have to have an injection into my hip - the spot that gets the needle is called the bursa - and the problem - let's see if I can spell this beauty - trochanteric bursitis -

Frankly - I could do without this - I feel as if I have had enough but life does go on - and it does go on and on and on

I saw my therapist yesterday - my feelings about my sister are giving me a hard time - i could do without that too

At least January is passing quickly - it usually lasts for much longer than 31 days - but I have been down to the beach a few times and I always love that - for a long time I lived very close to the beach - now it's a bit further but I can still get there

And I just got up to let Companion Cat in and after a hot and humid day with have had rain and it's really steaming out there - and it's 8.21 pm -

At least the weather has been warm -

Dec

Hi @Owlunar

sorry for the delay, its been a stressful day with pops specialist appointment.

Thats ok ,lfe does go on but its nice to see you here either way.

Lectures can be boring cant they. Its tough not having your sisters support or even really a relationship. Itll be nice if you could form a siterhood again but sometimes its not to be...

ahh sorry to hear about the bursitis, those needles are suppose to be horrible! I hope its not too bad for you but might be nice to have some emotional support or a stress ball to squeeze just in case.

Im glad your seeing your therapist, I hope your finding her helpful and getitng some of your thoughts and things sorted out as well.

Hi @outlander

Lectures - I went to so many and I found that was where a lecturer usually told you exactly what you needed to know for your exams and essays but that day - I had read all he was telling us - I think he hadn't prepared for the lecture and I had.

During the lecture I felt that time of the month had started and I was wondering if I needed to leave the theatre and attend to this but to the end I was hoping to learn something and in the last few minutes I learned what to read for the next week and after than I got his lectures on tape and just listened to the end and know what to read and passed -

My sister - I really don't if after a life-time of being at cross-purposes there is any chance of getting friendly with her - I don't trust her - she is one of those people who is convinced she is the only person in the whole world who is right and I am so busy learning things I have a lot of different ideas in my head all the time and this is a huge difference between us - sigh - and she does hurt people

I wrote a lot into my Word Pad last night so I think I might have mentioned something about my sister here and I think if she had hurt only me with her lies I could stand that - but she caused our parents and our children so much pain too - and it is tough - really tough - and I think her life was pretty unhappy too - I have tried to look at her from her side and as annoying as it was for our brother and me to have to take her with us for teenage things before she was old enough - it was far harder on her and she blamed us but actually - we did our best. I can understand her hating it and in the process - hating me -

Basically our family life was out of control in a different way - icy silence is terrible - different from other kinds of abuse but still abuse

I hope I get to have the injection into my hip asap - but my appointment is on Wednesday unless there is a cancellation - and I think it will be okay because it is done during an ultrasound - my ancient mother-in-law had those injections without the ultrasound guiding the needle and ah - actually she was always a grumpy old lady but if she had one of those injections she was grumpier

I'm thinking of you and your Pop - it must be a hard task being a carer and I know he has probs with his pancreas and this is tough - so yes - a stressful day for you too - I remember when my gran was elderly - about my age now - she was frail and it was tough watching all of this when our parents did not consider for a moment letting us in on the details of life - we didn't really know what was happening and it was never explained

I must be feeling better - I have been writing more lately and it's a good cycle - the more I write the better I feel - when I am overwhelmed I can't think of what to write -

Thanks Outlander

Dec