Life and trauma

@Till23

I never thought about using the invisibility to sample the chips. You're an ideas person! If they're still soggy, i could drip them in for a bit extra when they're not looking. Where's this cloak?! Surely this Potter bloke isn't using it anymore.

Yes, that why i found it so helpful. It explained why i found it so difficult to make decisions that i knew were best for me but i always let the fear make me choose otherwise. It frustrated me growing up that i kept doing it and had no idea why i kept doing it when others didn't seem to find the same things difficult at all. It really helped me to forgive myself a bit knowing there was a reason. I found out about the same time about separation trauma with adoptees and insecure attachment styles. This was about halfway through last year. And for the first time I felt like I understood why i always struggled so much and that it wasn't just weakness.

@Former-Member

I understand... mostly. It's tricky. I guess you could look at it like, how much would you regret not asking them once the opportunity has passed? Is there a way to bring it up but leaves it for them to decide without feeling there's any pressure?

@MJG017 Harry Potter definitely isn't using it anymore so it's time to hand it over 😂.

That's the thing, it's time limited. And I would regret it for the rest of my life should I not choose to offer the opportunity. I think it's just got to be done at the right time but ultimately it's going to be the other person that will decide if it's something they want to consider. Anyway that's my random thought for the day. Just another thing that's racing through my head 😂.

I just want to try and make a difference to this person's life for all they have done for me.

@Former-Member

It's one of those things only you can decide. But it sounds like you feel like the best option is to ask, But that it's just a matter of timing. It sounds like something sensitive, but at the same time it is definitely something you are doing with kindness, love and gratitude. Obviously i have no idea what it is. Maybe i'm missing something obvious... it happens a lot, 😂 but it's hard to see how someone could be too upset by it with the thoughts behind it.

@MJG017 definitely missing something obvious 😂.

I'm just treading with caution, like I said I don't want to ruin a good thing. Approaching someone is hard but even more so when you haven't done so before.

@Former-Member

Believe me, i know it's hard to approach someone with anything all personal like that. For me the fear of rejection is far too high. Because even simple things i will read far too much into. So are you treading with caution because of your own fears about doing something you're not comfortable or confident with? Or is it more because of how they may react?

@MJG017 i think it's more their reaction.

@Former-Member

How bad could it be?

@MJG017 that's a good question. My heart wants to do it.

@MJG017 i have a case of the heebie-jeebies. My back door blew open with the wind and then I saw a flashing light, like a torch flashing. I hate that feeling when you feel like you aren't alone in your house 😂. I only knew the back door was open cos I went to get a drink and felt a cool breeze and my aircon isn't on 😂.

@Former-Member

My instinct says listen to your heart. I know it's a very compassionate and loving one, so it seems like a heart worth trusting to me. If that ruins anything, then maybe it was destined to be ruined eventually anyway.

When you get a scare like that, it makes the heart jump out of your chest doesn't it?!