Anyone started with the NDIS?

I was aware of those facts you mention @Bunniekins but when I popped up at ATO with a new address after several years off the radar, they sent me a statement with my balance owing (15 years after my study and I'd never earned anything like the threshold). It was a case of either pay it or watch it keep accruing due to indexation.

Hi @Bunniekins @outlander @Appleblossom @Former-Member @Bunniekins @Former-Member @CheerBear @Mazarita @Faith-and-Hope

What a day I had yesterday ....... spent 2 hours working through and discussing the statement to AAT and NDIS with sil. Overwhelmed with emotion several times. Then the next 2 1/2 hours editing it and adding things to it and clarifying things that sil had been unsure about. It's about 15 pages long and includes a lot of info about my past - BP episodes, traumatic events that caused cPTSD, medication and hospitalizations, functional impact currently from all of that plus the way I'm affected now, and answers to the questions I listed a few posts ago re what would adequate support mean for me, what support do I get now, how my life would be different if that adequate support was happening and how long I think I'll need such support ( the last one ... d'uh ..... who can predict the future??)

Full realization that I have a life-long condition with BP and it will always require constant management, both medically and by myself and supports. And that I've had PTSD since at most 10 years old (now 54).

And some shockers for me too. For a long time I've known that there were chunks of my life that I just couldn't recall or make sense of. Working through my life story like this with sil and bro has meant finding out what they experienced and them helping me remember more details with more accuracy. My timeline is now more complete. However, several times I was quite shocked by the details that fill the gaps in my recollection.

e.g. I was in a coma for 10 days after S attempt, not just resuscitated. I was in hospital that time for over 6 weeks, not less than 2 that I remembered. How other family members were impacted by my behaviours. Who looked after my child and for how long.

So I'm having trouble sleeping, waking every hour or so with fresh information bouncing around in my head - none of which I am proud of. More like shame and guilt. And anger at a health system that contributed in no small way to my outcomes many times. Adverse medications, no follow-up on discharge from hospital several times ..............

and, and, and

@Former-Member this is another time the NDIS process is taking a huge toll on me and knocking me for six.

@eth Sheit! I had no idea I thought you had to be earning ... well I couldn't pay it off now regardless ... I might contact the taz office and ask have things changed at all. I would have to wait for an inheritance to pay it off as there is no way I could do anything about it right now ...

@eth Dear eth what a nightmare for you .... I am not even going to try i dont think I am strong enough to go through it. Am getting flash backs lately of how I was when I was manic and I just couldnt cope with doing what you are doing. You are so strong eth my heart goes out to you right now. lots of love gp xxxx

Oh @eth what an ordeal. I can relate to the shock of finding out details that I couldn't recall about when I was in hospital, post massive manic episode. My daughter sometimes tells me bits and pieces. But this is not in one sitting. That's so hard. It is really sad to be reminded of how BP is not going to go away. When I can, I push that away but really it's always there and even sometimes when I take my medication in the morning I stare at it and wonder what life without MI could be like.

So much to process for you and no wonder you are having trouble sleeping. And shame guilt and anger are exhausting. I feel like you, and me, and others here have been given such a crappy hand to play. Something that I'm working on, is to let go of those awful feelings that create an extra layer of pain. Sometimes the best we can do is try to be kind to ourselves. I feel for you and will be thinking of you today. You're not alone

Hi @eth @Former-Member @CheerBear and all others doing battle with the NDIS, as well as other systems like CL,

I have absolutely nothing useful to say, but I wanted you to know how incredibly angry it makes me that these systems make it so so SO hard to get the support that people need. It is this that drives me to keep on keeping on, and to aspire to change the world. Right now, I'm working on step 1 of world changing, which is stay alive. I will keep on working on that step so that at some point I might move to step 2.

It should not be this hard, it simply should not!

💜💐💕 @eth ....

I'm so sorry, @eth.

Oh @eth

I am so sorry about the triggering of those memories. I think the brain works very hard to shield itself from such bad. But I do think it also has to take a lot of good to do so. If you talk to a Doctor I would say to try & talk about what you've remembered, it might help save the good. I still lose memory, I can't remember my child when they were little. I found a box of letters, full of love, from my child from their teenage years - I have absolutely no memory of them, all I remember from their teenage years is arguments & them leaving. Because my brain can not handle anything bad it has to take so much good. I know everyone is individual, but it's something I feel very strongly - I wish I had had the chance to get it out, my family was told never to speak of it - I think that let it continue.

I don't remember a lot about the years it took to get the pension. My Sister helped me, well she came into a job mob interview {I was with a disability 1 for years, on the dole for about 7} & the next thing I knew I was applying for disability pension. She was, I've forgotten what they're called {could sign the papers & make appointments & I had to get my money through her} & she did fight tooth & nail for me for a few years. I eventually got too much for her {or her for me} & I took her off, it was just after I did that that the pension was approved.

During those years there were endless meetings & constant appointments with Doctors. During those appointments I discovered she was helping me because she harboured great guilt for letting a man take me. She was playing detective {she was only 12} & scratched the number plate number on her arm & went straight to my Mother. My Mother didn't come after me. I didn't want to know that, I don't want to know that. It is too late now.

I really feel for what your going through. I know what it's like to try & get by on the dole, I honestly couldn't afford food, not even for my beloved dogs - they weren't just ribby, their backbones were sticking out - so shameful. Life is so much better now, not only can I afford food but I don't have to go to meetings or appointments, I would have taken less money for that. It is worth fighting for

Niqua