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Am Not Coping

Am Not Coping

I am really not coping at the moment but this is entirely on ME!

This is a message for a few people on here @utopia @Former-Member @Faith-and-Hope @Former-Member

that I asked could be passed on but it seems that only part of it has been and I understand from the responses that have made it through my emails that I have caused untold distress for some people. I was not going to return because of what I felt I put people through but I especially wanted @utopia and @Former-Member to know that they were not wrong at the time and I was going through a real crisis period. You both held me together for longer than I could myself until the point where my own self-destructive thoughts overwhelmed me.

The entire message that I sent to SANE is below:

I have just viewed the multitude of emails and messages sent from forum members and members of the SANE team – as well as the text and voice message left on my phone.

I have not been able to communicate with anyone since the other night as I have been recovering from what ended up being an unsuccessful attempt to end the pain.

At the time I was in a very distressed state and I did want to stop the pain and all I seemed to achieve is to cause others pain and worry and that is the last thing I wanted to do – I just wanted to end mine and say goodbye to everyone beforehand so my future absence was explained. I should have realised that the message I posted would have concerned some people but I really was not in any state to think about the repercussions for others.

I am so sorry I caused so much distress to others – that is something I will have to hopefully try and live with.

I don’t believe after the concern and anxiety I caused to so many that I will ever be able to return to the forum.

Can someone from the SANE team please explain all this to all those involved and pass on my gratitude for their compassion, concerns and kind words throughout the time I have been part of the ‘forum family’.

Thank you and sorry again for the difficult position I put everyone in.

Zoe7

I do not want any responses from any of you. I just wanted to let you know exactly what has happened and let you know how truly sorry I am for hurting people I have come to think of as friends and family, and who I really care about.

Your support, advice and compassion are what make you all the wonderful people you are.

@utopia and @Former-Member I am so sorry that the trust you placed in me has now been broken because of my actions. I also felt that we had a stronger connection, especially over the last week, and you both helped me in ways I cannot even describe or explain. I was not pulling away from you two - just wanted to pull away from myself. I couldn't cope with my own feelings and no-one or nothing was actually going to be able to stop me at the time. It's now just another failure to add to my list of failures. I really don't know what else to say to you both but to reiterate my heartfelt 'sorry'.

38645 replies

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In response to: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

It's still early days re the Vit D @Zoe7 .... apparently it takes some time to restore your levels, but the dr has also dealt with the dysmenorrhea in a different way too. In any case, it's the weekend, and she is in a better mood on the weekends because she doesn't have to work for WH for two days ...... it's definitely linked, but I'm gonna let the dr deal with it ..,,, along with the rest getting sorted by degrees. I am under enough pressure without stepping up to be receiving more fallout / backlash ......

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

Have you heard anything from your friend yet @Faith-and-Hope

In response to: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

No ..... not yet @Zoe7 ..... 😔

Hopefully she is just taking a time-out. It's hard not knowing what to do to help her though ...... I love her and miss her.

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

are you able to talk a little more about what is happening for her @Faith-and-Hope?

In response to: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

Not really @Zoe7 ..... I would like to, but she hasn't said much herself ..... just that she wasn't coping very well at the moment.

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

I get that @Faith-and-Hope so maybe she doesn't know how to BE or what to do atm - I can relate to that.
It certainly doesn't mean she isn't also thinking about you - it is probably the exact opposite - but she may not want to burden you with her problems - I totally get that too!

In response to: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

I wish she would tho ..... it's part of a loving relationship. Carrying someone else's burden along with them is not the same as when it's you're own ..... you have the same care and concern but not the same pain, so you can take on some of theirs just naturally without overwhelm.

@Zoe7 ......

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

But for some @Faith-and-Hope it is really difficult not to see that as an imposition/burden that you do not want others to carry for you - it is hard enough carrying itself!

In response to: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

I know @Zoe7 ..... 💚💐💕 ..... and that is part of the immense value of these forums ..... you begin to experience what it is like to help someone else, a few others perhaps, with their burdens, and realise that you can do that without them actually being "yours" ..... it's one step removed, but still heart-close .....

Slowly, slowly you can begin to realise that that is what it is like for others who are there to help you too ....

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

I totally agree @Faith-and-Hope - you have infact helped me already tonight by focussing more on YOU - and in turn having just a little respite from my own head!

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