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Am Not Coping

Am Not Coping

I am really not coping at the moment but this is entirely on ME!

This is a message for a few people on here @utopia @Former-Member @Faith-and-Hope @Former-Member

that I asked could be passed on but it seems that only part of it has been and I understand from the responses that have made it through my emails that I have caused untold distress for some people. I was not going to return because of what I felt I put people through but I especially wanted @utopia and @Former-Member to know that they were not wrong at the time and I was going through a real crisis period. You both held me together for longer than I could myself until the point where my own self-destructive thoughts overwhelmed me.

The entire message that I sent to SANE is below:

I have just viewed the multitude of emails and messages sent from forum members and members of the SANE team – as well as the text and voice message left on my phone.

I have not been able to communicate with anyone since the other night as I have been recovering from what ended up being an unsuccessful attempt to end the pain.

At the time I was in a very distressed state and I did want to stop the pain and all I seemed to achieve is to cause others pain and worry and that is the last thing I wanted to do – I just wanted to end mine and say goodbye to everyone beforehand so my future absence was explained. I should have realised that the message I posted would have concerned some people but I really was not in any state to think about the repercussions for others.

I am so sorry I caused so much distress to others – that is something I will have to hopefully try and live with.

I don’t believe after the concern and anxiety I caused to so many that I will ever be able to return to the forum.

Can someone from the SANE team please explain all this to all those involved and pass on my gratitude for their compassion, concerns and kind words throughout the time I have been part of the ‘forum family’.

Thank you and sorry again for the difficult position I put everyone in.

Zoe7

I do not want any responses from any of you. I just wanted to let you know exactly what has happened and let you know how truly sorry I am for hurting people I have come to think of as friends and family, and who I really care about.

Your support, advice and compassion are what make you all the wonderful people you are.

@utopia and @Former-Member I am so sorry that the trust you placed in me has now been broken because of my actions. I also felt that we had a stronger connection, especially over the last week, and you both helped me in ways I cannot even describe or explain. I was not pulling away from you two - just wanted to pull away from myself. I couldn't cope with my own feelings and no-one or nothing was actually going to be able to stop me at the time. It's now just another failure to add to my list of failures. I really don't know what else to say to you both but to reiterate my heartfelt 'sorry'.

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In response to: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

@Former-Member I will try to 'chat' but no promises I can say much. Let me know when you are able to jump on.

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That is completely okay, lets just see how we go. I am free now okay 🙂

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Ok @Former-Member

In response to: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping


@Zoe7 wrote:

Mentally I don't have any energy to think but all I do is think! Flashbacks and thoughts consume every waking minute and nightmares at night. I can wake literally not knowing where I am and believing I am back in time and in constant pain and consumed with fear. Sometimes when I close my eyes (even during the day) I have horrible images flash in my mind - they are so real that I literally freeze wherever I am from fear.

How do I feel - defeated, lost, stuck, broken. I don't know where to turn or what to do anymore. I have lost hope that I can get past this and I would not care if I went to sleep and did not wake up.

@Eden1919


Hugs @Zoe7

The way you describe feeling now resonates with my last post to you. It's good that you are recognising that fear is doing this to you. The more isolated we are with our thoughts and in our day - the worse this becomes. Distraction helps, as does keeping the mind and body busy. That's what I also need to do because I battle with this darknss too. It can only win if we believe what it is telling us. If we choose to listen. The best thing to do when like this is yes - stay connected, not just online but importantly in real life. Stay connected with positive others doing positive activities.

When we lose hope the bigger the lies of fear grows and takes a hold over our minds. That is what it is telling you "there is no hope". It is telling you are still in the past. The past is over - gone and dusted. It onl has a ho,d if we hold onto it. Today is he reality and tomorrow will take care of itself. Don't allow fear to dominate or listen to its lies Zoe, do not believe it as where there's life and a will, there is always hope. I am living proof. Even if life isn't perfect it isn't all evil - good shines through. We just have to see it here. We just have to see it in you and how you helped me and others. Fear and pessimism seeks to rob you of that good, that love - seeks to rob you of you. Fight back. If people like you opt out imagine the darkness of the world. Hold on.

I agree that mindfulness when in such a distressed state is near impossible, it is for me. Hope and an image of a better future fights this distortion of perception head on. But having a person of support is vital when it gets really bad. Someone to hold us up and show us some light. Keeping reaching out here and in real life to those who have your best interests at heart. And start to believe in you. The good in you - he value you have in spades as a person. Tha person who raised me up out of a dark state which not many can do. You did.

If you didn't who knows what may have resulted. You are here for a reason. Don't let irrational fear rob you of you. How you fought for us, fight now for yourself. I would not lie to you. You have what it takes to do this. It is up to us whether we choose to believe the lies or those who love us. Yes, you do have control over this my friend. Try and stay connected more during the day to push out the lies in your head. It will get better the more you do the latter and never, ever lose hope. If I can do this you will fly. Lots of love always xx

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P.s. Sorry for the spelling errors - my iPad is old and playing up. The keyboard freezes - hopefully you can follow what I am saying xxxx

In response to: Am Not Coping

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💐💜💕🤗 @Zoe7 .....

In response to: Am Not Coping

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@Zoe7, reaching out to you today. I don't believe in goodbyes so not going there. You have to stay strong.

I believe in you Zoe, many have walked the same path before you, all over the world.

Try get some sunshine today Zoe ☀

Life is difficult, but not impossible 🌷

Lapses 🌿

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@Zoe7 Hi I havent been around much today as I have been a bit busy but I hope you got some sleep even if just a little. how are you going today?

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Re: Am Not Coping

Looking for you @Zoe7 .....

WH is being a nasty pasty and I need distracting ......

Looking for my favourite butterfly to hang out with ......

🤗🤗🤗🤗💜💐💕

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

That Faith-connection must have done it again @Faith-and-Hope

Been offline since talking to Lunar - needed to 'park it up' for a while so have been snuggled on the couch most of the time with Toby crying. I have managed to have a shower and get out of my jammies this afternoon.

What is the nasty pasty doing to you today Hon?

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