FORUMS

Connect with people who understand what you are going through, seek advice and surround yourself with support. We're free, anonymous, and professionally moderated 24/7.

  • 47,612Members
  • 1,358,869Posts
  • 1,400,000Visitors
Our stories

Am Not Coping

Am Not Coping

I am really not coping at the moment but this is entirely on ME!

This is a message for a few people on here @utopia @Former-Member @Faith-and-Hope @Former-Member

that I asked could be passed on but it seems that only part of it has been and I understand from the responses that have made it through my emails that I have caused untold distress for some people. I was not going to return because of what I felt I put people through but I especially wanted @utopia and @Former-Member to know that they were not wrong at the time and I was going through a real crisis period. You both held me together for longer than I could myself until the point where my own self-destructive thoughts overwhelmed me.

The entire message that I sent to SANE is below:

I have just viewed the multitude of emails and messages sent from forum members and members of the SANE team – as well as the text and voice message left on my phone.

I have not been able to communicate with anyone since the other night as I have been recovering from what ended up being an unsuccessful attempt to end the pain.

At the time I was in a very distressed state and I did want to stop the pain and all I seemed to achieve is to cause others pain and worry and that is the last thing I wanted to do – I just wanted to end mine and say goodbye to everyone beforehand so my future absence was explained. I should have realised that the message I posted would have concerned some people but I really was not in any state to think about the repercussions for others.

I am so sorry I caused so much distress to others – that is something I will have to hopefully try and live with.

I don’t believe after the concern and anxiety I caused to so many that I will ever be able to return to the forum.

Can someone from the SANE team please explain all this to all those involved and pass on my gratitude for their compassion, concerns and kind words throughout the time I have been part of the ‘forum family’.

Thank you and sorry again for the difficult position I put everyone in.

Zoe7

I do not want any responses from any of you. I just wanted to let you know exactly what has happened and let you know how truly sorry I am for hurting people I have come to think of as friends and family, and who I really care about.

Your support, advice and compassion are what make you all the wonderful people you are.

@utopia and @Former-Member I am so sorry that the trust you placed in me has now been broken because of my actions. I also felt that we had a stronger connection, especially over the last week, and you both helped me in ways I cannot even describe or explain. I was not pulling away from you two - just wanted to pull away from myself. I couldn't cope with my own feelings and no-one or nothing was actually going to be able to stop me at the time. It's now just another failure to add to my list of failures. I really don't know what else to say to you both but to reiterate my heartfelt 'sorry'.

38645 replies

591 - 600 of 38,645

In response to: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

Aw @utopia

I can feel that - I really can - and I am so glad your Mum takes those stronger tablets -

Yes - with your boy at school - with his sax - you can sleep - yes - it is easier when it's light outside

Well - I insist - I do insist - get some warm salty water and hold it in your mouth then spit - but be careful not to disturb the clot - which should be settling by now - and that will ease your mouth and freshen it as well - water won't do that

Having had a lot of teeth out I know this is the best topical treatment - save the cloves for your other teeth

I really care about this - I would get you the salt if you don't have it - I would be taking care of you and getting your soft food like yoghurt - I have been alone the day after dental treatment to want to look after you

Aw - I feel miserable for you

Dec

What can I find - oh yes - one I saved from Clip Art

Yeah - I know 😞

In response to: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

Sorry @Decadian - I can't see your image you posted. Probably my old ph and the bad internet service here. Been bad all year. Particularly bad this week.
Yes I have salt and will go and do a mouth rinse now. Clove oil is great for sore teeth. But really need to put it on Almost every tooth. Yes @TAB - my teeth are that bad. No didn't work yesterday or today. Can't drive the 170km return trip when I've taken the meds. And can't concentrate to do the job properly on the meds or in pain. So just relaxing at home today.

In response to: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

I agree @Decadian that anyone should be encouraged to follow whatever path they wish in study. I try to tell my kids that it doesn't matter what they are good at or what they like - there is a place for everyone in this world - and it only exists because people are different and like to do different things!

I have done enough study for now - 2 degrees, a graduate diploma and an associate diploma (plus the HECS fees) is enough for now. There is something else I have looked at studying but not just yet.

You definitely are a most interesting woman Dec.

Love hearing your stories and points of view on things.

Got through another night so that is positive.

Hope your day has some light in it Dec

In response to: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

@Zoe7. Yes I'd like to see less talk and more action. These things seem to take forever and a day.

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

The images take a while to come up @utopia.

Now go and get some rest my little Cocky friend

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

fair enough @utopia hope you get some relief

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Life can be a Pain

Thanks for the feedback @Zoe7

We all need our stories - they add up and make our lives sense over time

I spent a lot of time with the three grandparents I had during my lifetime - and they were all story-tellers

And I like looking outside the box

Which means I have another pic - and so glad you can't find yours @utopia - it's a big tooth with a grin on it's face -

So - looking outside the box

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

Thanks to everyone for getting me through another night (and morning).

I'm officially exhausted. A couple of hours sleep (hopefully) then off to the vet and GP.

Catch you all later!

Zoe

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

All the best today @Zoe7

See you later

Dec

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

@utopia @Faith-and-Hope @Decadian @BlueBay

Took Toby to the vet - the good news is that she didn't find a grass seed in his paw. It may have been a bite or a small cut and we have some cream to put on it for about a week to see if that helps. So relieved he didn't have to have an anaesthetic and/or operation. I also don't have to worry about paying until I can afford to - whenever that will be. Told her it may be a couple of months and that is ok Now that I kmow for sure that if anything happens to my my fur babies I can just take them in without worrying about the cost it has really taken away some of my stress.

@Former-Member @Appleblossom @Former-Member @Former-Member @Former-Member @Former-Member @Shaz51 have been thinking about all of you just have been too caught up in myself and keeping my head above water to reach out to you all to see how you are doing. I know you all understand but I still wanted to let you know you are all in my thoughts

591 - 600 of 38,645