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Am Not Coping

Am Not Coping

I am really not coping at the moment but this is entirely on ME!

This is a message for a few people on here @utopia @Former-Member @Faith-and-Hope @Former-Member

that I asked could be passed on but it seems that only part of it has been and I understand from the responses that have made it through my emails that I have caused untold distress for some people. I was not going to return because of what I felt I put people through but I especially wanted @utopia and @Former-Member to know that they were not wrong at the time and I was going through a real crisis period. You both held me together for longer than I could myself until the point where my own self-destructive thoughts overwhelmed me.

The entire message that I sent to SANE is below:

I have just viewed the multitude of emails and messages sent from forum members and members of the SANE team – as well as the text and voice message left on my phone.

I have not been able to communicate with anyone since the other night as I have been recovering from what ended up being an unsuccessful attempt to end the pain.

At the time I was in a very distressed state and I did want to stop the pain and all I seemed to achieve is to cause others pain and worry and that is the last thing I wanted to do – I just wanted to end mine and say goodbye to everyone beforehand so my future absence was explained. I should have realised that the message I posted would have concerned some people but I really was not in any state to think about the repercussions for others.

I am so sorry I caused so much distress to others – that is something I will have to hopefully try and live with.

I don’t believe after the concern and anxiety I caused to so many that I will ever be able to return to the forum.

Can someone from the SANE team please explain all this to all those involved and pass on my gratitude for their compassion, concerns and kind words throughout the time I have been part of the ‘forum family’.

Thank you and sorry again for the difficult position I put everyone in.

Zoe7

I do not want any responses from any of you. I just wanted to let you know exactly what has happened and let you know how truly sorry I am for hurting people I have come to think of as friends and family, and who I really care about.

Your support, advice and compassion are what make you all the wonderful people you are.

@utopia and @Former-Member I am so sorry that the trust you placed in me has now been broken because of my actions. I also felt that we had a stronger connection, especially over the last week, and you both helped me in ways I cannot even describe or explain. I was not pulling away from you two - just wanted to pull away from myself. I couldn't cope with my own feelings and no-one or nothing was actually going to be able to stop me at the time. It's now just another failure to add to my list of failures. I really don't know what else to say to you both but to reiterate my heartfelt 'sorry'.

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In response to: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

@utopia There are a couple of people that I can support under any circumstance - you included - it does actually help me sometimes to take my mind off myself for a little while. It is really when it comes so unexpectedly - like a switch has been turned in the middle of a conversation - and I do find it difficult to deal with. We walk such a fine line sometimes and when a conversation turns so quickly it does have an effect. Then I find it hard to come back on and ask for support myself because I don't know who is going to be around and where the conversation will go. I am really hating this feeling. I have got so much out of the forum and I really value the 'friendships' that I have formed but I really don't know how to get back to feeling safe on here and asking for support when I really need it.

In response to: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

Hugs, "life is difficult, but not impossible"

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

@Zoe7. If that happens and you do need to step away from a thread, why not post on your thread here, that you can't do anything about other peoples issues. We that know you well enough, will know what you mean. Just talk about how our kids or dogs or mums are driving us crazy. But nothing else.

Do you think you might need a new post, with a different title, one where others won't be encouraged to post about 'big things'. Only you post those things.

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

I thought we probably should start a new thread called the Octagonal Room @utopia for all those that use it. I'm not sure that staring a new thread or asking people not to post 'big issues' will discourage them - it seems to be happening wherever I go lately!!!

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

Love the idea of a thread called The Octagonal Room. This would be a place where we can chat freely and have a laugh and be a bit silly, or sit quietly. @Zoe7

Then your Not Coping thread can be kept/used for more emotional or indepth issues. What do you think?

I think the Octagonal Room would be a safer place for you to be. And maybe you make it clear to people that there is to be no triggering issues discussed or even the word 'trigger'. etc.

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

I'll do it tomorrow - so I can be in a better headspace to get the intro wording right. @utopia Then if anyone does 'change the subject' quickly anyone can refer to the aim of the thread and be 'polite' about the 'rules'. Hopefully that will allow for ALL people to feel safe and welcomed again - and not just me.

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

Time to turn our clocks back an hour @utopia. That means I can officially be back on the same time as Queensland when @oceangirl returns from hospital - miss my little sis

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

Yes I like that idea @Zoe7. A safe space for all. So all need to 'pull up' anyone that goes outside the rules. I think that's great.

Is there going to be a picture of what the Octagonal Room looks like? That could take weeks to design.

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

Hopefully Oceangirl is doing really well in hospital. And will come home a lot calmer and centred and content.

@Zoe7

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

I'm sure I'll be able to find aome kind of image from 'my best friend Google' to post to show what the Octagonal Room looks like - if not - I'll just draw it!!! @utopia We do have an outside fort and an octagonal cat-run now also so it might need to be drawn arghhh!!!! I'll repost all the images for 'the corners' that we have already got and tag those people in as I do it. It will take a little time but I have plenty of that lol.

Is there anything specific you would like in your gardening corner? (chocolate is NOT allowed lol)

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