Am Not Coping

Hi @Zoe7 ..... 😊💕

Well done .... sleeping on and off all night ❣

I'm having another night like that .... wasp King every 2 hours it seems ..

2 x 2hrs = 4 hrs so far .... 2am here ...

Just stepped in to say that it's good to see you, and even if it was broken sleep, you have still taken care of your physical body .... ✅ .... and that's important.

Keep to the task of keeping yourself safe and wait for the flat feeling to pass, as it will.

Can you do drawings or paintings of the two images I sent ? Pastels would work too ... I like the idea of an ink drawing of the peacock feathers, with watercolour overlay to add the beautiful colours ....

Distract, distract, distract from your feelings .... and if you find it too hard, call your psych or GP, or both ....

Just keep distracting yourself, filling the time, and keeping yourself safe ,.... the thoughts and feelings will pass .... even picking up a tennis racquet or table-tennis paddle in your mind's eye and keep swatting negative thoughts away from you can work. I bric-wall them out .... that's my visualisation, and I can build a mental brick wall really fast now .... ❣ Only user-friendly thoughts have a day-pass with me ....

❤️💕

Hi @Zoe7

Believe it or not Zoe - it's encouraging news just that you have sent a message - life can be putrid at times and the nights can be the worst

I get a lot of help from Life Line and maybe I can give you a couple of hints

It's difficult to ring at night - it's a time when the people they have on duty are really busy - and you can be holding on for a long time and getting more and more desperate and when someone answers they already have more calls coming through and they are short on time - so it's best to be really succinct with what you want to talk about at night -

So I have found it better to ring during the day and talk about whatever it was during the night - but the time the day shift starts it's often quite and the staff are fresh and ready to help - and I think they start around 7.,00am

Also - before I ring I think about what to start talking about first - not to talk about a lot of things at once but rather pick on or two things - and you might be lucky and get someone ready to talk for a long time -

I worked as a TC for a while - some people are easy to talk to and others less so - but I wish you the best - and another hint - if you think you are in for a bad night right earlier in the evening - and say that is why you are ringing - you have had bad nights and want to sleep and you have tried all the usual things and need to talk about whatever

Maybe you will get better results this way - I hope so

But to have a suicide line not ring back when it is advertised as a 24/7 service - that is disappointing - maybe they just don't have enough staff and have long calls - I really don't know but that would be very hard for you waiting for a call to come

I know you feel as if you are no one special - but you are - you really are - we are all special in some way - and you don't expect help - but you will get it here - you and @utopia did well the other night

And Utopia - all the best with that tattoo - I want a tattoo but my gd who does tattoos told me my skin is way to old - I left it too long - darn it

Great work girls

Dec

Rtw @Zoe7 .... and everyone .... meet Wintersun Cat .....

She wasn't sprawled on the tiles yesterday .... but just resting like this quietly by the door .... gave me a silent meow, but closed her eyes for the camera .... lol .....

She's claiming squatter's rights .... and she's squatting .... right ?? 😆 ..... sorry ... couldn't resist a little bad humour here .... 💕

@utopia @Faith-and-Hope Most of my art supplies are at school. I took them up last week when I only stayed for 2 hours. I don't think I am able to drive that far to get them. Both those images @Faith-and-Hope would be good done in either pastels or water colours and I like the idea of an ink drawing of the feathers with a watercolour overlay.

Drive safely @utopia and take it easy in the rain.

@Decadian Thanks for your thoughts and suggestions.

I know I can talk to you guys here and my GP and psych are available but to be honest I just don't know what to say anymore. Same sh*t - different day - just getting harder and harder. Am at the stage where I just want to sleep and for it to all go away. I usually feel this bad during the nights - is really concerning me that I can't shake it at all at the moment - day or night.

Don't think I'll be online much today - just not coping.

Sleep if you need to @Zoe7 .... if that's what begets you through this spell of treading water and you're tired .... but you only have to say to your GP or psych "I'm not coping ...."

Just that.

If you need that help, reach for it.

If you want another story to distract you, I will tell you about Santorini ....

💜

Hi again @Zoe7

Same sh^t different day stuff - I totally get that - I really hated housework and felt so p^ss^d off at home doing that while three other people where out doing other things I went back to school

But I have had a lot of that through my life so I know what you are talking about

At the end of the day we can love what we do - we can be creative or just enjoying something we can do - I play the piano - years since I had one so I am starting from scratch with the keyboard but I can still read music - I just keep going back to the keyboard - then leave it and go back

And I get it that you like art - can you get some stuff locally rather than go back to school to get it - you don't have to do art all day - I'm not an artist but I sketch - years since I did much like that - but I can get back to it

Filling in time when your mind is doing a jingle on a theme you are fed up with is really hard to cope with - and what people suggest can be a pain too at times - but you will find something you like - I read a lot

Do I ever read a lot - do you have any novels in your house you haven't read for a while

What about movies?

Or is that noise in your head telling you what you don't like overpowering and you just want to sleep

I get it - you just don't know anymore - I understand -

One thing I do know is that feeling like this is boring - and boredom is one thing that will move us along - when you have felt like this long enough you will move along - I know this for a fact

But in the meantime - same sh^t different day

Hugs though - Dec

Hi @Zoe7

It's probably not helpful but lie down and feel horrible and hopefully sleep -

I could do that myself today - the weather feels horrible too - I live in Melbourne - it hot and humid and windy and headache type weather

We understand - take the day off

Dec