Am Not Coping

One that represents all of them @Zoe7 ..... 💕

I am hearing you, and sitting with you this afternoon. I have done whatI came to do, apart from tying up a few loose ends, and catching up with a few special ladies .... so it’s time to get my hands back on the wheel with my final assignments. I am almost finished this level certificate 🎉

I am so sorry to hear how you are feeling Hon .... it’s aweful, and as usual you are so insightful about what is happening for you. This is the little slump-time ahead of the upcoming changes, which are hard to get excited about at this time, I understand, especially when feeling soul-weary ..... but I am sitting here with you this afternoon. What is our brew ? A chai latte or something ? I will put the kettle on .....

Hugs and hugs ..... 💜🦋

Hi @Zoe7

"It feels like everyone I am closest to are not only struggling but absent also".

"So both offline and online connections for me seem to be very distant and that is feeding into my sense of loneliness and worthlessness ...and there is a great sense also that I can't change any of that".

I can very much relate to that, I am feeling like that a lot of the time myself, despite considerable efforts to change things.

Hugs (((Zoe))) & Hugs to Cat & Toby too.

Adge

Have you been able to talk about what is happening for you Hon? I know you said Mr. did not want you to mention he had someone else but I am really hoping that you have found someone to let in on your truth and help you work through that @Faith-and-Hope To be totally honest he has no right to ask that of you and he needs to deal with the consewuences ...and quite frankly I hope he feels the full force of everyone's anger.

I'll have a hot choclate thanks - might help me sleep tonight.

It is a very hard thing to be dealing with @Adge Sorry you are feeling the same - maybe safety in numbers where we can get that connection is the key right now hey

Yep, getting my big girl pants on here @Zoe7 ( @Teej has shown me a bit about that) and need to do some sorting out .....

Hot chocolate it is .... 🍫 ☕️💕

Good to hear @Faith-and-Hope You deserve that care and support in all this rather than secrecy and alienation. Do what you need to to protect yourself too Hon and don't let him get away with either the betrayal or lies. He may have an ED (amongst other issues) but he has made his own choices and he has to face the consequences of those. As you can tell I am sooo angry about this for you and honestly the way you are dealing with it all is amazing.

Yes definitely @Zoe7 I wouldn't wish those feelings (of disconnection), or traumas & losses on anyone.

I do find that relating to people's feelings (eg yours) - can offer an opportunity for connection & understanding (at least on my part) sometimes.

I'm glad I got some new birds (to replace some of those I lost) - however, the shock of losing so many (16 it was in the end), several weeks ago is still with me.

So that tainted my excitement.

I'm so scared of losing any birds now - that I keep going out to check on them.

Adge

I am glad you got some new birds too @Adge but they do not replace the ones you lost. It is about rebuilding up your love for the new ones and gradually feeling that security that they are okay - and that takes time. I am so happy that the news about Cat was so much more than any of us expected but I am also feeling so deflated from going through all that over the pasts few weeks. It is like nothing has changed but everything has changed at the same time. I have gone from wanting to spend all my time with her to letting her do her own thing again - and that has in a way made me feel empty again. It is hard to explain but it has really affected me.

Hiya @MDT @Adge .... anyone else around 👋💕

Hot chocolate for anyone else ?

@Zoe7 ^^^ 😊