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Am Not Coping

Am Not Coping

I am really not coping at the moment but this is entirely on ME!

This is a message for a few people on here @utopia @Former-Member @Faith-and-Hope @Former-Member

that I asked could be passed on but it seems that only part of it has been and I understand from the responses that have made it through my emails that I have caused untold distress for some people. I was not going to return because of what I felt I put people through but I especially wanted @utopia and @Former-Member to know that they were not wrong at the time and I was going through a real crisis period. You both held me together for longer than I could myself until the point where my own self-destructive thoughts overwhelmed me.

The entire message that I sent to SANE is below:

I have just viewed the multitude of emails and messages sent from forum members and members of the SANE team – as well as the text and voice message left on my phone.

I have not been able to communicate with anyone since the other night as I have been recovering from what ended up being an unsuccessful attempt to end the pain.

At the time I was in a very distressed state and I did want to stop the pain and all I seemed to achieve is to cause others pain and worry and that is the last thing I wanted to do – I just wanted to end mine and say goodbye to everyone beforehand so my future absence was explained. I should have realised that the message I posted would have concerned some people but I really was not in any state to think about the repercussions for others.

I am so sorry I caused so much distress to others – that is something I will have to hopefully try and live with.

I don’t believe after the concern and anxiety I caused to so many that I will ever be able to return to the forum.

Can someone from the SANE team please explain all this to all those involved and pass on my gratitude for their compassion, concerns and kind words throughout the time I have been part of the ‘forum family’.

Thank you and sorry again for the difficult position I put everyone in.

Zoe7

I do not want any responses from any of you. I just wanted to let you know exactly what has happened and let you know how truly sorry I am for hurting people I have come to think of as friends and family, and who I really care about.

Your support, advice and compassion are what make you all the wonderful people you are.

@utopia and @Former-Member I am so sorry that the trust you placed in me has now been broken because of my actions. I also felt that we had a stronger connection, especially over the last week, and you both helped me in ways I cannot even describe or explain. I was not pulling away from you two - just wanted to pull away from myself. I couldn't cope with my own feelings and no-one or nothing was actually going to be able to stop me at the time. It's now just another failure to add to my list of failures. I really don't know what else to say to you both but to reiterate my heartfelt 'sorry'.

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In response to: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

Indeed @Zoe7

Sometimes it just doesn't feel like it at all. Luckily however, the truth is better and even stronger than how we feel. So while the feeling isn't there, the truth definitely is. A bit like an insurance policy I suppose.

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Re: Am Not Coping

Sometimes hard to see the truth when emotions cloud the path @MDT

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Re: Am Not Coping

very much so @Zoe7

In response to: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

Hi @Zoe7 that’s really tough whst your mum wants to do. I can understand your anxiety with this. I’m sure she loves and cares fir you so much and that’s possibly why she wants to complain.

I know you’ve had a tough time lately.

I hope the SI doesn’t escalate. Pls take care.

And it sounds like you have a fantastic acting principal.

Hour by hour you’ll be ok.

Hugs lovely ❤️❤️

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

I need to stand my ground firmly with this one with my mother @BlueBay especially since I do not have a school yet for the remainder of the term. If in the future I consider talking about the process and how badly it was handled last year then that is my choice - not hers.

Day by day here BB but I have mowed the backyard today so that is one less thing I need to do this week - small wins

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

Yes I totally agree with you @Zoe7

It’s your decision if you decide to put a complaint in. Not your mums.

When will you find out about the rest of the year eith the school you’re in?

good on you fir mowing the grass. Thsts a good win.

I hope you have a good night. Xxxooo

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

I don't know @BlueBay I have to leave that in the hands of the Principal and wait - not much else I can do but having the support of the Assistant Principal and Principal is lovely to know. Hope you have a good night - I will be in bed early tonight.

In response to: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

@Zoe7 . That's great news that the Principal will ask the Dept for you to stay at their school.

It must be a wonderful feeling to know you are appreciated and wanted.

I'll have everything crossed for you. But let us know as soon as you find out.

❤

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

I will let you all know as soon as I find out anything @utopia I suspect it won't be to later in the term but hopefully with the Principal backing it can be sorted earlier. Hope you have a good day my beautiful cocky friend

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

hi @Zoe7 I have a narcissistic mother so I know fully the complexity & pain of what it's like to have a mother who makes it all about her. Like you, my mother blamed me when her boyfriends were violent towards me. She also liked to tease, taunt, humiliate and provoke me until I'd scream for her to stop, then she'd do it a lot more for hours and I wasn't allowed to have any food or something to drink. As a result now I have unrelenting rage as the major symptom of my MI.

I don't agree with bluebay that your mother is acting out of love for you. I think her motives are selfish & to do with protecting her reputation & standing in her professional context and self-pride. You are right to stand your ground. I find it very difficult to do that with my mother as she always plays victim and makes me feel guilty - it's is hard not to feel sorry for her & responsible for her emotional welfare. But it is important for me to stand my ground and put my interests first. Good on you for standing firm, the past school is best left in the past and your energies need to be focused on the awesome present that you have achieved in this lovely new school.

On a lighter note @Zoe7 and @Faith-and-Hope I had a lovely lunch with my aunt today! SHe was really supportive and uplifting. (SHe is my mother's sister so knows how wicked she can be). We had a good chat & I'm glad I went as I was feeling reluctant and blue about it before but forced myself to do it. I hope there has been some light in your day today x

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