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Am Not Coping

Am Not Coping

I am really not coping at the moment but this is entirely on ME!

This is a message for a few people on here @utopia @Former-Member @Faith-and-Hope @Former-Member

that I asked could be passed on but it seems that only part of it has been and I understand from the responses that have made it through my emails that I have caused untold distress for some people. I was not going to return because of what I felt I put people through but I especially wanted @utopia and @Former-Member to know that they were not wrong at the time and I was going through a real crisis period. You both held me together for longer than I could myself until the point where my own self-destructive thoughts overwhelmed me.

The entire message that I sent to SANE is below:

I have just viewed the multitude of emails and messages sent from forum members and members of the SANE team – as well as the text and voice message left on my phone.

I have not been able to communicate with anyone since the other night as I have been recovering from what ended up being an unsuccessful attempt to end the pain.

At the time I was in a very distressed state and I did want to stop the pain and all I seemed to achieve is to cause others pain and worry and that is the last thing I wanted to do – I just wanted to end mine and say goodbye to everyone beforehand so my future absence was explained. I should have realised that the message I posted would have concerned some people but I really was not in any state to think about the repercussions for others.

I am so sorry I caused so much distress to others – that is something I will have to hopefully try and live with.

I don’t believe after the concern and anxiety I caused to so many that I will ever be able to return to the forum.

Can someone from the SANE team please explain all this to all those involved and pass on my gratitude for their compassion, concerns and kind words throughout the time I have been part of the ‘forum family’.

Thank you and sorry again for the difficult position I put everyone in.

Zoe7

I do not want any responses from any of you. I just wanted to let you know exactly what has happened and let you know how truly sorry I am for hurting people I have come to think of as friends and family, and who I really care about.

Your support, advice and compassion are what make you all the wonderful people you are.

@utopia and @Former-Member I am so sorry that the trust you placed in me has now been broken because of my actions. I also felt that we had a stronger connection, especially over the last week, and you both helped me in ways I cannot even describe or explain. I was not pulling away from you two - just wanted to pull away from myself. I couldn't cope with my own feelings and no-one or nothing was actually going to be able to stop me at the time. It's now just another failure to add to my list of failures. I really don't know what else to say to you both but to reiterate my heartfelt 'sorry'.

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In response to: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

@Sam3 hey there

Just what you said here is really important:

" I don’t want to descend into self-pity, & must also avoid fear."

That is very well said.

In response to: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

ok makes sense, re new job @Zoe7 yeah no nap yet, have to wait for stuff to dry but that would be about 5mins once get on the line today lol

In response to: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

I havent rung yet @Sam3 , it did eventually occur to me that it could have been due to sequence of work, as in people were talking about transformer being energised soon. Will find out later

yes re uncertainty and work and mh, its all circular

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

Thanks @MDT - you need to know that your energy and application to looking for work and pushing outside of your comfort zone encourages me also. Keep doing what you are doing and you will kick goals soon as well - I believe in you buddy

@Sam3 I understand how much our mental health is closely aligned to employment - for so long I had work and that was about it - now I am trying to find a better balance but work is essential in finding that balance as well. Just like @MDT you sound like you are doing everything possible to find work and I truly hope those efforts pay off soon for you. You also want to do your Cert IV so you are looking to the future and that is key in helping with depression. So often we get stuck in the here and now and can't see any further ahead so for you to be doing that I think is a great step forward. I did forget to tell you last night to write your list for today - whoops sorry - got caught up in the cricket and then getting to sleep. Will catch up with you later when you are home

@TAB Any washing I pegged out in the garage right now would be dry in seconds - it is so hot in there I can barely breathe. Having a break now and a big drink. I have done 3 of the 6 supports and cut another one. 2 left to cut and then screw in and I can start sheeting. Heard from my sister this afternoon too and she is going to come around and help me tomorrow so I'm going to try to get them measured and cut today and tomorrow morning. Garage getting there

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

@Sam3 exactly

As @Zoe7 said. Not being able to see further ahead is a great step in the right direction. It's exhausting trying to search for work. I can empathize though, I just got some average news in relation to my own stuff - regarding finances and cost of things. But as @Zoe7 pointed out. We can't afford to get stuck in the here and now. Shift focus and think about what needs doing and where to go.

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

Is it all more expensive than you first thought to apply for the Visa @MDT?

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

Pretty much @Zoe7

But it all balances out. I am doing it through a company that specialise in the UK Visa. Just to ensure it is all done correctly - as there is no refund on the fee for the application.

I feel like I am vigilant enough not to make a stupid error. But I think at the same time it will be good to have SOME contacts during the process so it isn't just me and then the visa application itself.

Not having money sucks though.

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

Somewhat regretting my career path/choice.

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

sounds good re garage @Zoe7 take it easy am feeling it now after going to shops and getting washing in and making bed and its only 32 supposedly now, but getting to 38 and nothing under 37 for rest of week. hazy and humid today. Having a pause for a bit to cool down then most likely try a nap

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

hey @TAB

take it easy with the heat today. The same is true for in fact
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