Am Not Coping

Thanks @Former-Member for the warm welcome (& if that’s a photo of Holly, she looks adorable) & I loved those cheerful emojis @Former-Member I know virtually nothing about cricket, but glad to see others enjoy following it. Hope you all have good naps! I had a very strange, piercing 🐦 bird call wake me this morning which I actually found amusing! Still drowning in overwhelming thoughts whilst overlooking a messy house & children, but distracting myself with this forum & a detective novel. Elastic is everything I’m not - do others have tips for self-acceptance or, at minimum, just even liking oneself?!

no fairytales today re cricket @Zoe7 @Former-Member well I guess it sort of was already re Cummins

That is a really tough question @Sam3 and one that I really struggle with too. I know that being part of this forum over the last couple of years has really helped me like more parts of me than I did before - there is comfort being amonst others with similar issues and yet still being myself - that is all we can be at the end of the day. It has taken me a long time to even get to thinking that way so sorry if I don't have any suggestions for you - I have had lots of support from my healthcare team and that has helped. Do you have a GP, psychologist, psychiatrist that you see?

The inevitable is nearly here with the cricket - no surprises there though @TAB

surprises can be good @Zoe7 not today tho

Thanks @Zoe7 - thought you were going to have a nap?! Yes I have a psychiatrist & in the past have utilised a psychologist & a counsellor/mindfulness teacher. Don’t feel like I want to ‘waste’ money on this again though because I typically don’t implement their suggestions for very long & im really bad at routine which is so important. As the years since 2014 onset of depression creep by, I feel less hopeful about putting in effort to change. I was walking every morning up until a week ago but have given up believing/caring about getting better (instead evidently choosing self-pity). Some of this may also be related to medication side effects. Good to know the forum has helped you to like parts of yourself.

I did have a quick nap @Sam3 but got woken by a phone call so up again now.

It is good you have a psychiatrist.

I think we can fall into bad routines just as much as good ones and that doesn't help our depression at all. The biggest change for me has been meds that have helped me become more stable but that has taken over 2 years of trial and error ...and some really dark times. I also begun DBT just under a year ago and that has really helped along the way too - but I also know that wouldn't have heled if I was not more stable on the meds.

@TAB I am watching Panda Babies at the moment - they are so adorable 🐼

is that a show ? @Zoe7 there was a panda show on the other night. B loody petrolwhipper snipper going next door where unsavoury neighbours departed from around 9mths ago ,, oh dear guess someones moving in again re place being cleaned up. Anyhoo going to have to go to shops may get a coffee or something going a bit stir crazy here, yet sick of driving same streets to same places for same reasons ugh

Thanks for sharing @Zoe7. I assume you mean DBT for BPD? I’m so pleased the meds got you to a place where you could benefit from DBT. I think one of the toughest things is the patience required to improve one’s mental health. I’m not patient & taking years to improve is daunting, especially with 4 dependents. That’s the bit where people say “one day at a time”! Just spoke to my 94 yo Aunt who responded to my comment about how I wish I was like her with “Well you’ve got a few more years to practice!”