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Am Not Coping

Am Not Coping

I am really not coping at the moment but this is entirely on ME!

This is a message for a few people on here @utopia @Former-Member @Faith-and-Hope @Former-Member

that I asked could be passed on but it seems that only part of it has been and I understand from the responses that have made it through my emails that I have caused untold distress for some people. I was not going to return because of what I felt I put people through but I especially wanted @utopia and @Former-Member to know that they were not wrong at the time and I was going through a real crisis period. You both held me together for longer than I could myself until the point where my own self-destructive thoughts overwhelmed me.

The entire message that I sent to SANE is below:

I have just viewed the multitude of emails and messages sent from forum members and members of the SANE team – as well as the text and voice message left on my phone.

I have not been able to communicate with anyone since the other night as I have been recovering from what ended up being an unsuccessful attempt to end the pain.

At the time I was in a very distressed state and I did want to stop the pain and all I seemed to achieve is to cause others pain and worry and that is the last thing I wanted to do – I just wanted to end mine and say goodbye to everyone beforehand so my future absence was explained. I should have realised that the message I posted would have concerned some people but I really was not in any state to think about the repercussions for others.

I am so sorry I caused so much distress to others – that is something I will have to hopefully try and live with.

I don’t believe after the concern and anxiety I caused to so many that I will ever be able to return to the forum.

Can someone from the SANE team please explain all this to all those involved and pass on my gratitude for their compassion, concerns and kind words throughout the time I have been part of the ‘forum family’.

Thank you and sorry again for the difficult position I put everyone in.

Zoe7

I do not want any responses from any of you. I just wanted to let you know exactly what has happened and let you know how truly sorry I am for hurting people I have come to think of as friends and family, and who I really care about.

Your support, advice and compassion are what make you all the wonderful people you are.

@utopia and @Former-Member I am so sorry that the trust you placed in me has now been broken because of my actions. I also felt that we had a stronger connection, especially over the last week, and you both helped me in ways I cannot even describe or explain. I was not pulling away from you two - just wanted to pull away from myself. I couldn't cope with my own feelings and no-one or nothing was actually going to be able to stop me at the time. It's now just another failure to add to my list of failures. I really don't know what else to say to you both but to reiterate my heartfelt 'sorry'.

38645 replies

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In response to: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

Awesome coffee machine @Zoe7 💜 You'll need to stock up on lactose free milk if I'm going to be allowed to stay in the octagonal room too 😝😳

anything I can help with. I'm trying hard to do a catch up day as you've seen. I'm ok to help out for a bit if you need.

In response to: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

@Faith-and-Hope @Former-Member
Made the mistake of feeling ok and reading what I probably shouldn't have just yet - too close to home - @Faith-and-Hope will fully understand. Just need some distractions and to take my mind elsewhere!

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

Hi @Zoe7 @Former-Member .......

I'm just back from English service at church ..... nice to be able to hear it all in my mother tongue sometimes .....

We have had rainy days in the last few days, but the clouds cleared away yesterday, and we have a beautiful 30deg day here ..... not that I can walk around in that without sun protection, so I am sporting a beautiful umbrella ..... black with a wooden handle and stunning roses in Spring / Autumn colours around the edges like a garden to take everywhere and anywhere with me .....

🌸🌷💐💗💕🌺🌹💐

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

@Zoe7 are you okay? xxoo

In response to: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

Thanks @Faith-and-Hope you know how much I love your stories 💕
@BlueBay I really just need some distractions - anything you guys have to tell me will help 💙

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

Im really glad I didn't tag you before somewhere then @Zoe7. I was going to and thought better of it. Been trying to think of distractions. Realised I kind of suck at thinking of distractions myself right now which is probably why you and I end up in a similar boat often. So taking it away from that and playing to your strengths how about you design me a purple amazing corner in your place. Somewhere that will calm me and hopefully you when we go there 💜🤗😘

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

OK @Zoe7 describe the colourful butterfly you are on my shoulder?

Where is toby?

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

Yep @Former-Member Think it might have been exactly where I went anyway!!!!

I thought you liked your corner in the octagonal room already - ok let's make that one the communal corner and I'll design a brand new purple corner just for you - how does that sound?

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

Ahh so you're really asking for Teej's verbal :pile_of_poo: You know I can deliver that 😝

Today I was just delivered a new (second hand) mattress. It was on of my best friends and it cost her.....wait for it........ $3000. Anyway she is getting rid of it because it was too hot for her going through menopause as it is really padded. Now when I said yes to it a few months ago I was so excited. I have a really crappy mattress. BUT now guess who's got the thermals at night going and I'm scared it's going to be too hot. :face_with_rolling_eyes::face_with_rolling_eyes::face_with_rolling_eyes:

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

@Zoe7 @Former-Member @BlueBay .....

Do you know that I am a part-time Vegetarian .... ?

How does that work ?

Its based in religious practice (voluntarily ..... cos nobody can MAKE me eat only veggies .... lol) and the principle is that it's actually more important to govern what is coming out of your mouth, than what is going into it ....

So why is fasting important enough to make it a feature of the faith ?

Because actually choosing to observe boundaries helps our body to establish a whole series of its own equilibriums ..... its own awarenessses .... control its own appetites in general ..... it is in fact a very good way of breaking down destructive patterns of behaviour ,.... and this is the important part .... if it is approached as a form of self-nurturing rather than tightly policed rules .....

So .... if you break the fast and have dairy .... so what ? You broke the fast ..... start again when you're ready .... self-compassion right there ..... you're just walking song with yourself .... holding your own hand .... with a whole bunch of other people who are doing the same thing, for the same reasons.

The fasting foods are lighter foods, easier to digest, so they give the body system a rest.

So .... I'm having a lentil burger with chutney and coleslaw for lunch just now .....

What did everybody else have ?

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