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Am Not Coping

Am Not Coping

I am really not coping at the moment but this is entirely on ME!

This is a message for a few people on here @utopia @Former-Member @Faith-and-Hope @Former-Member

that I asked could be passed on but it seems that only part of it has been and I understand from the responses that have made it through my emails that I have caused untold distress for some people. I was not going to return because of what I felt I put people through but I especially wanted @utopia and @Former-Member to know that they were not wrong at the time and I was going through a real crisis period. You both held me together for longer than I could myself until the point where my own self-destructive thoughts overwhelmed me.

The entire message that I sent to SANE is below:

I have just viewed the multitude of emails and messages sent from forum members and members of the SANE team – as well as the text and voice message left on my phone.

I have not been able to communicate with anyone since the other night as I have been recovering from what ended up being an unsuccessful attempt to end the pain.

At the time I was in a very distressed state and I did want to stop the pain and all I seemed to achieve is to cause others pain and worry and that is the last thing I wanted to do – I just wanted to end mine and say goodbye to everyone beforehand so my future absence was explained. I should have realised that the message I posted would have concerned some people but I really was not in any state to think about the repercussions for others.

I am so sorry I caused so much distress to others – that is something I will have to hopefully try and live with.

I don’t believe after the concern and anxiety I caused to so many that I will ever be able to return to the forum.

Can someone from the SANE team please explain all this to all those involved and pass on my gratitude for their compassion, concerns and kind words throughout the time I have been part of the ‘forum family’.

Thank you and sorry again for the difficult position I put everyone in.

Zoe7

I do not want any responses from any of you. I just wanted to let you know exactly what has happened and let you know how truly sorry I am for hurting people I have come to think of as friends and family, and who I really care about.

Your support, advice and compassion are what make you all the wonderful people you are.

@utopia and @Former-Member I am so sorry that the trust you placed in me has now been broken because of my actions. I also felt that we had a stronger connection, especially over the last week, and you both helped me in ways I cannot even describe or explain. I was not pulling away from you two - just wanted to pull away from myself. I couldn't cope with my own feelings and no-one or nothing was actually going to be able to stop me at the time. It's now just another failure to add to my list of failures. I really don't know what else to say to you both but to reiterate my heartfelt 'sorry'.

38645 replies

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In response to: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

Hi @utopia

Why is there a stigma? Bl^^dy good question - I dunno

But Freud - yes - he was a pioneer in the field - said it was all due to - shhh - Dec is whispering - sex.

That's why women startimg having hysterectomies - they were having their hysterics removed -

And as well as Freud I have reads a lot of Renaissance History - sex was good but women were bad and tainted and if they had a baby a man was not supposed to look at them - or something - in case he caught something I guess

But we should be past that and so many people are not - darn it - hence the stigma

I am sounding off - I hope this is not too dramatic

cya Utopia

Dec

In response to: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

Huge tick @Zoe7. Big wins for you. It's not always easy to walk away - even though you need too. So that's a huge learning tick. And please know - if you put the @ symbol and then type moderator after it - a moderator will step up. This has been added so that when someone is in crises, not only can they monitor the situation - but they can assist.
The reality is - we are not professionals. And as much as we want to help others - we need to put our own health first - & sometimes, we are out if our depth.
Just like you, I'm learning to step away when my health needs it.
We are becoming smart little people!
No nightmares - that's great. My dreams were odd and vivid and disturbing. But easy enough to deal with this morning.
I'm planning on reading more of my Aboriginal Heritage book today & enjoy the sun a bit.
Do you have any plans?

In response to: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

Yuk - I am sorry @utopia

That was not good

Have a quiet day and recover -

Dec

In response to: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

@Owlunar. Oh the stigma associated with being female.
I just posted on my Facebook, how I put fresh white sheets on the bed and then that night I got my period & then had to take the sheets off and out clean ones on.
Some friends weren't happy about me posting about the mess of periods - & I wasn't even descriptive.
I don't know why we still have a problem with saying vagina or talking about our periods or other bodily functions.
Are we still being punished for being women? Are our bodies hideous? Do we need to hide away from what is a normal everyday occurance for half the worlds population?
Why is this still taboo?

In response to: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

"Having their hysterics removed .... " oh @Owlunar .... you're gorgeous .... !!

Hi @Zoe7 .... I came on the scene a bit late yesterday .... hope you and @oceangirl are okay this morning .....

Love n hugs .....😘 ❤️🤗

In response to: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

@Owlunar. Got a bee in my bonnet now.
Do you know there are girls and young women in our society, who remove all body hair - because they perceive it to be dirty.
Some girls now always wear a panty liner - because they don't understand our normal bodily functions.
They want to remain nice and 'clean' - whatever that means.
If only we would discuss our bodies more openly. Let the younger generation know how a normal body works. And that there is nothing wrong or dirty or unclean about their bodies.
Rant over.

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

Big wins for both of us @utopia

I really could feel that 'unable to help and unable to cope' feeling last night - so yes I did do the right thing for myself - we are both becoming smart little people (and if you new how short I was that is incredibly apt lol)

Glad you have been able to deal with your dreams this morning - I really expected nightmares - probably added to my up and down night - but relieved it was only broken and restless sleep and not super distressing (wow- I am starting to sound like @Phoenix_Rising lol)

My plans for today - chemist and GP (as usual this afternoon), have already watered the garden and pulled the shelves down in the kitchen to be able to wash the walls easier. Then I am going to try and tackle a bit more of the spare room - need to get set up for @Faith-and-Hope and I's painting fest when WH leaves - going to be fun - looking forward to developing something along with someone else and seeing how it turns out.

Sounds like your plans today are going to be nice and peaceful and relaxing. TICK TICK TICK

In response to: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

Sounds like a great creative endeavor @Zoe7. So how will you & @Faith-and-Hope do it?
Are you going to say a theme or an object? Maybe the colours to use & then compare how you both interpreted that with your finished pieces? That would be an interestingprocess if you did it that way.

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

Hi @Faith-and-Hope Yep I'm ok - thanks for your concern. I did step away (read above posts to our little Cocky friend) - hug win for me personally - did make it easier - still hard but dealt with it

How are you this morning - fix your remote? WH settled down in your head?

Zoe

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

@utopia ...

@Faith-and-Hope posted a few stepping stone images and I chose one of them. We are both going to paint the same image - then post what we have done - we both have very different styles so it is going to be really interesting - and exciting - to see how we both interpret the same image. I am even thinking of doing a series of the same image using different mediums- see how adventurous I am!!!!

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