Am Not Coping

@Zoe7

That would of been hard heearing that from your pdoc. I guess they are trying to tell you it will take time. My pdoc told me the other week that although I will learn to manage everything, it will always be with me. Hmmm I guess he was just being realistic becasue even though we hope to get "better", it will always be a part of us, and I guess that is a fact for anyone who has gone through trauma.

HAHA, yes they do say "Variety is spice of life". Mine can switch between different traumas raidly but not a common thing. I haven't told anyone yet, but my flashback the other night was triggered by my hubby. He doesn't know of course, wasn't his fault, and I don't think I would ever tell him, but yea.

Don't feel bad about asking for support. You were not to know that you would have that reaction. But it does show you how many people care for you on here and how many want to help you. Think of it that way, you have lots of support on her becasue you are worth it

@Former-Member It used to be that with different triggers I had different reactions but I also was completely numb to any feelings most of the time. Now it is like many jigsaw puzzles have been thrown into one box and mixed up - and whatever pieces fall out when the box is shaken is a mystery!

I can't actually remember a time that I have asked for support and actually needed to 'talk'. When I have asked previously ( not much but a few times) I have more needed a distraction. It is hard to 'talk' but does make it easier when you know the person you are 'talking' to understands. I know others want to help but it makes it harder when they don't understand - it is not a time to be explaining oneself!

@Zoe7I love the analogy of your flashbacks to different jigsaw puzzles. To me that seems like such a simple way of explaining such a difficult situation. Might have to 'borrow' that one!

It defiently makes it easier when the person understand. I think because when I am around family/friends (which isnt much these days) I feel like the elephant in the room and that everyone is judging me even though I know they are not. On here in forum land, I don't feel different because I can relate to people and they can relate to me.

Sometimes I find I need to talk things through and then there are other times I need a distraction and other times I just sit! Please don't let what happened last night put your off my asking for support again. We all need that from time to time.

It's all yours @Former-Member - borrow away - but while you have it do you think you would be able to solve all the puzzles for me and present them back to me completed and framed - thankyou that would be amazing LOL

@Former-Member I find it hard when very well meaning people want to help but you know they don't 'get it' and then it becomes a struggle with myself - stay and potentially be further triggered and feel worse or leave and know you will feel worse - it's a no win situation and I find it really hard to deal with because I don't want to inadvertently hurt anyone but on the other hand I can't look after myself - too hard!

@Sans911 sorry - didn't mean to ignore your response earlier - got side tracked and forgot - pretty much where I am sitting with life atm

What it really comes doen to is I find it very difficult asking for help - it has always just been me having to deal with everything myself. I not only find it incredibly difficult to seek support but even more difficult talking about why I need support. Therefore if I am 'asking' and need to 'talk' then I have reached a critical stage where the alternative is I am not likely to remain safe.

Ahhh @Zoe7 that magic wand needs to be found for your sleep and for your jigsaw puzzles. That would be a great magic wand to find! I wish I could find it for you

I guess this is where the forum is hard. I love that people want to help but I guess when their cicumstances are different, it is hard to relate to them. And that is not saying their MH issues are not just as important, they are just different.

It's a bit like that introduce yourself thread. When people first write on there I read them and some I can relate to and some I would not have a clue how to even begin relating to what they are going through.

I think you have every right to politley tell someone thank you but no thank you. You need to do what is best for yourself hun and what helps you the most.

@Zoe7sorry hun, I need to log off for awhile. Not coping with last Thursday coming back up and feeling not quite right. Will be back on later. Bigs hugs

I totally understand @Former-Member - but please know that although these feelings are coming back up for you - you are not responsible in anyway for any of it. I can imagine your mind ticking over into that territory as I know you thought that last week. This has become a wider issue of support and safety across the board - not just one incident. Look after you Hon and I will be looking around for you later