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Am Not Coping

Am Not Coping

I am really not coping at the moment but this is entirely on ME!

This is a message for a few people on here @utopia @Former-Member @Faith-and-Hope @Former-Member

that I asked could be passed on but it seems that only part of it has been and I understand from the responses that have made it through my emails that I have caused untold distress for some people. I was not going to return because of what I felt I put people through but I especially wanted @utopia and @Former-Member to know that they were not wrong at the time and I was going through a real crisis period. You both held me together for longer than I could myself until the point where my own self-destructive thoughts overwhelmed me.

The entire message that I sent to SANE is below:

I have just viewed the multitude of emails and messages sent from forum members and members of the SANE team – as well as the text and voice message left on my phone.

I have not been able to communicate with anyone since the other night as I have been recovering from what ended up being an unsuccessful attempt to end the pain.

At the time I was in a very distressed state and I did want to stop the pain and all I seemed to achieve is to cause others pain and worry and that is the last thing I wanted to do – I just wanted to end mine and say goodbye to everyone beforehand so my future absence was explained. I should have realised that the message I posted would have concerned some people but I really was not in any state to think about the repercussions for others.

I am so sorry I caused so much distress to others – that is something I will have to hopefully try and live with.

I don’t believe after the concern and anxiety I caused to so many that I will ever be able to return to the forum.

Can someone from the SANE team please explain all this to all those involved and pass on my gratitude for their compassion, concerns and kind words throughout the time I have been part of the ‘forum family’.

Thank you and sorry again for the difficult position I put everyone in.

Zoe7

I do not want any responses from any of you. I just wanted to let you know exactly what has happened and let you know how truly sorry I am for hurting people I have come to think of as friends and family, and who I really care about.

Your support, advice and compassion are what make you all the wonderful people you are.

@utopia and @Former-Member I am so sorry that the trust you placed in me has now been broken because of my actions. I also felt that we had a stronger connection, especially over the last week, and you both helped me in ways I cannot even describe or explain. I was not pulling away from you two - just wanted to pull away from myself. I couldn't cope with my own feelings and no-one or nothing was actually going to be able to stop me at the time. It's now just another failure to add to my list of failures. I really don't know what else to say to you both but to reiterate my heartfelt 'sorry'.

38645 replies

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In response to: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

Breathe @Pepsimax ....

Can you turn on a night-light and the TV ?

Make a cup of tea ? It's soothing ....

In response to: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

@Pepsimax I think distraction might work best. Radio or tv. Do you have any washing that needs doing? Some cleaning?
Is there a book you enjiy reading?

In response to: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

@Pepsimax. I find tv a good distraction for me. Mind numbing but it helps.
Do you have Netflix or some dvds? What about a favorite comedy show you can put on?
Are you able to practice relaxation and breathing techniques. These help me a lot - especially when I notice I'm starting to get anxious.

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

@Pepsimax

I am around for a bit

I have done cleaning all hours of night to work off energy

but you sound more like you are tired too ...

Lately I have been loving looking at artwork on the net .. just letting my interest in the subject style place or the artist .. dictate .. its been both restful and engaging ..

I am not sure what your hobbies and interests have been .. they can be good to distract you enough from the flashbacks .. but at some time it might be helpful .. to quickly jot down .. what happens in the flash back so you can work on it later ???

It helped me .. to record it .. and take back some control over my mind .. I may never re-read stuff in my journals

In response to: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

@utopia have the tv on i could tidy my room have to put things away @Faith-and-Hope I will make a cup of tea

In response to: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

@Pepsimax. Flashbacks are a bugger to deal with. But just know that they can't hurt you now. It's simply a memory. It's not happening any more. You are safe tonight.
When a flashback hits - open your eyes and look around you. You are not there anymore. You are safe. Take a deep breath and let it out fully. Take a few more deep breaths.
You are safe.
Simply breathe and regulate your breathing. Gentle normal breaths now.
Nothing is there. Nothing can hurt you. You are safe tonight. Telk yourself they are just old memories. It's in the past. I am safe now.

In response to: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

@Pepsimax. Getting a cup of tea or cleaning yiur room can help distract you. That's good. When you get too tired and need to go to sleep - put an image in your mind. A beautiful picture - an image that makes you smile - or feels calming. Snow capped mountains. A cabin by a lake. Puppies or flowers.
Stay with that image when you close your eyes. Focus only on that image and the feelings of happiness and calm.
Just like with meditation - if your mind wanders - just bring it back to your image.
Breathe. Fall asleep with that image in your mind. Peaceful, restful, dreamless sleep

In response to: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

@utopia I will be ok just hard sometimes

In response to: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

I understand @Pepsimax. Some days are harder thsn others. But tomorrow is a new day. And it's going to be a good day for you.
I'm off to sleep now. If you need me during the night, I'll be by your side, keeping you safe.
♥♥

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

@Zoe7 I hope you had an ok sleep.

@Pepsimax It sounds like last night was really tough with the flashbacks . Were you able to get back to sleep at some point?

@utopia How is your itchiness today?

I am feeling much better this week than I was last week. Thank you for inviting me to hang out here with you guys. I may not drop by so much while I'm travelling ok...which I think sounds terribly rude of me! However, it is really important to me that the forums remain a useful tool and not something that I become hooked on. I hope the day treats you well. It is a sunny but not insanely hot day here in Sydney right now and I am feeling quite bright, so I need to go and be productive while I can .

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