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Am Not Coping

Am Not Coping

I am really not coping at the moment but this is entirely on ME!

This is a message for a few people on here @utopia @Former-Member @Faith-and-Hope @Former-Member

that I asked could be passed on but it seems that only part of it has been and I understand from the responses that have made it through my emails that I have caused untold distress for some people. I was not going to return because of what I felt I put people through but I especially wanted @utopia and @Former-Member to know that they were not wrong at the time and I was going through a real crisis period. You both held me together for longer than I could myself until the point where my own self-destructive thoughts overwhelmed me.

The entire message that I sent to SANE is below:

I have just viewed the multitude of emails and messages sent from forum members and members of the SANE team – as well as the text and voice message left on my phone.

I have not been able to communicate with anyone since the other night as I have been recovering from what ended up being an unsuccessful attempt to end the pain.

At the time I was in a very distressed state and I did want to stop the pain and all I seemed to achieve is to cause others pain and worry and that is the last thing I wanted to do – I just wanted to end mine and say goodbye to everyone beforehand so my future absence was explained. I should have realised that the message I posted would have concerned some people but I really was not in any state to think about the repercussions for others.

I am so sorry I caused so much distress to others – that is something I will have to hopefully try and live with.

I don’t believe after the concern and anxiety I caused to so many that I will ever be able to return to the forum.

Can someone from the SANE team please explain all this to all those involved and pass on my gratitude for their compassion, concerns and kind words throughout the time I have been part of the ‘forum family’.

Thank you and sorry again for the difficult position I put everyone in.

Zoe7

I do not want any responses from any of you. I just wanted to let you know exactly what has happened and let you know how truly sorry I am for hurting people I have come to think of as friends and family, and who I really care about.

Your support, advice and compassion are what make you all the wonderful people you are.

@utopia and @Former-Member I am so sorry that the trust you placed in me has now been broken because of my actions. I also felt that we had a stronger connection, especially over the last week, and you both helped me in ways I cannot even describe or explain. I was not pulling away from you two - just wanted to pull away from myself. I couldn't cope with my own feelings and no-one or nothing was actually going to be able to stop me at the time. It's now just another failure to add to my list of failures. I really don't know what else to say to you both but to reiterate my heartfelt 'sorry'.

38645 replies

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In response to: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

I am not tagging anyone, reading anyone's posts or even know what is going on here in forum land.

Today my heat pump ceased working! It is cold, I am tired and this is the very last thing I needed right now - oh and I had an argument with my mother just to top it off. This may very well be the final straw.

I am already feeling the effects of the cold and if I get any sicker then I really won't be able to cope at all. If I could go to bed and stay warm then it may help but that is not an option. I don't know how I am going to stay warm AND sleep tonight. I feel like the 'storm' is coming quickly now and I can't do anything to stop it. I am scared of what tonight may bring under these circumstances - and I am feeling every bit of it!

In response to: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

Hi @Zoe7 ..... 🦋🐬💕

I am sitting with you ..... in the coffee shop cos I'm cross with WH and have taken a walk to blow off steam ..... grrr ..... cross with your mum too for upsetting you ..... ❣️

Is Chair Island warm if you layer it up with blankets ?

Can you let your gp and your psych know that your heat pump is down ? They should know about it .....

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

@Faith-and-Hope I am wrapped up tightly on Chair Island. Toby is close (where else would he be!) Cat is snuggled in her room where it is a little warmer. I have a small heater in the spare room but I can't get to it as it is behind EVERYTHING and I am too tired and sore to move all the boxes etc. I can't physically do it. I already have a sore throat and even after my puffer my chest is not good. It is going to be a long night.

I have left a message for someone I know who installs and repairs heat pumps so waiting to hear from them - and that may not be until tomorrow at this stage. I can't fix it as there are several small wires broken and anything to do with electricity needs to be done by those qualified - too dangerous! It is very old and may actually need replacing - so just another thing to worry about.

What has WH done to upset you?

In response to: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

Hold tight @Zoe7 ..... I am glad you are rugged up and Toby will help to keep you warm.

I am so glad to hear you have reached out to someone to come and see your heat pump for repair or replacement.

WH was frustrated about something and bullying me in the way he was communicating with me. When I spok up to him about his manner he just just got more abrasive, demanding and controlling, and then told me to "keep it down in front of the kids" ..... 😡 ..... to which I answered that I didn't appreciate the way he was communicating with me, and to speak up about it means compromising our kids, which isn't right either. That was the best I could do in the moment.

Using passive-resistance from there, I asked him factual questions to clarify what needed to be done, made a phone call, communicated with S2 who it is actually about / for, then left the house. So angry !! I am going to stay out until my feelings have settled down so I am not going home still angry ..... but grrrrr 😠

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

I would say keep walking to the airport and jump on the first plane here - but not without a heat pump lol

@Faith-and-Hope he has the nerve to tell YOU to keep it down in front of the kids - really! I might just sit on Chair Island and pretend I am in the coffee shop with you Hon

In response to: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

Thanks @Zoe7 ..... would love to be on a plane with a new heat pump for you right now ...... ❤️

Coffee shop has closed, so "cooking" my heels again ..... will look for my dolphins till the sun sets.

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

@Faith-and-Hope I wouldn't even care about the heat pump - you would be enough Hon

In any other circumstance I would say looking for dolphins until the sun sets would be very peaceful but maybe not so much presently How are you feeling about returning home?

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

Anyone around I really need some support right now.

I am really anxious - just had a massive shock, panicked and now trying to calm down.

Just need to know people are around to help me out.

I don't often do this but I REALLY need some help!

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

Beautiful @Zoe7

I'm not great but i am here for you my friend

In response to: Re: Am Not Coping

Re: Am Not Coping

Can you slow your breathing down @Zoe7

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