Never being in a relationship

@Former-Member sorry got busy!! I do want to reply more fully to your posts, but it will have to wait until I'm back online I'm afraid (so hopefully Monday).

Just a point of curiosity - are you looking for those experiences here? Or more just looking for ideas? Or maybe just feeling validated and heard?

How have you felt about your expeirences with the forums so far?

I hope you have a nice chill weekend, and I'll catch you next time 😊

@Jynx

I guess I want ideas for practical solutions and I want ideas for how to build a stronger community of people who are struggling with the same issues as me. Being single is a killer, I dont care about what people who say "you have to love yourself" or "being in a relationship doesn't fix everything". I know that and I feel like that invalidates or doesn't give people who are single a lot of credit. A lot of us are trying to do this but finding its hard being on our own.

I want there to be places for others to share their experiences in a world where relationships are all around us. I want more support for everyone but I know I cant do it all on my own.

@Jynx @tyme @rav3n @Ru-bee

I often feel like I am not neurologically wired properly to be in a relationship. I dont know how to navigate the early part of dating because I am shy and introverted and a man. That combination means I will never get acknowledged properly.

I am actually struggling so hard right now. I dont know if I need to be in hospital or just completely back away from life all together. I feel so lonely, isolated, and I dont know anyone else who is struggling with this at all.

@Jynx

Another thing I forgot to mention is that I think there is a serious lack of self esteem in men in society. Part of it comes from the fact that we are almost expected to be the jack-of-all trades. We need to be amateur mechanics, amateur gardeners, amateur home electricians, amateur psychologists etc. I dont know how we are meant to because we are surviving in this post capitalist just as much as everyone else is.

Hey @Former-Member ,

How about you start a support group here for single people/men?

It sounds like you are the expert here. I read you know what you are wanting from such a support group, so many that's the way to go?

Otherwise, I can start it if you need help... but I think it's more appropriate that you do.

Open to your thoughts.

@tyme

I have tried before but it didn't work out unfortunately though I think the issue was that I was doing it on my own and I didn't know what I was doing. If you are happy to help, that might make it easier?

What do you want me to call it?

Support for Single Men?

Support for Single Folks?

Answers for Single People?

Connect with Singles?

@Former-Member

Also, do you want me to post that list of points about what you'd like from the group?

I gotta log off now mate, but I look forward to making the thread next time I'm on (Wed evening) @Former-Member

We'll chat then and get this thread up and running!

@tyme

Lets call it Support for Single Men and yes please, the points would be a good idea too.

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@Former-Member wrote:

I often feel like I am not neurologically wired properly to be in a relationship. I dont know how to navigate the early part of dating because I am shy and introverted and a man. That combination means I will never get acknowledged properly.

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You know, I had a thought - you mentioned before you're neurodiverse; were the women you've been on dates with also neurodiverse? Because if not, that might also be a factor!!

I'm not at ALL saying that you shouldn't date neurotypicals, or that a relationship with one is impossible; but in some ways, it really is like we speak a different language! So, so often, what seems like a normal question or comment for us, is perceived as rude, blunt, or intrusive to NT's. It has definitely gotten me into trouble on more than one occasion.

Had a thought - how would you feel if I tagged you in the ASD social space? And in particular, I wanted to maybe chat a little about some of these dates you've been on - not to be judgemental, but to maybe get a little more understanding of how they tend to unfold, and whether there's things we can help you understand, alter, or improve upon!

We can also have the conversation in this thread, or in the Singles Support thread if you'd prefer - or not have the conversation at all; up to you.