Yeah, thats hard @Supportivemamma 💜
Sounds like there's lots of pent up stuff happening for your son, and he's not got the tools yet to let off steam in a more healthy way, and even more than that, is how he is currently feeling about himself... Im sure to hear him say he is angry he's still alive must've been devastating as a mum xx
He really sounds like lots of frustration is built up with nowhere to get out, and this would also likely lead to nothing being what he wants to hear - no matter who it comes from.
I wondered if this is a setback of some sort, and prior to this he was doing alright? If so, then logically I would tend to think that recovery is possible 🙂 I thought I would kindly say that in the hope of lifting that sense of permanency that tends to descend when things like this happen xx
The other thing I wanted to gently remind you of, is that even though its hard to do, you yourself deserve nurturing and a bit of space to ground and centre yourself, not only to care for you, but to give you the space to take a breath and step in with more resilience 🙂 xx
Feel free to chat more if you feel its helpful xx
I hope your night tonight is ok 💜
And just remember there are other supports you can call on if things do feel out of your comfort zone: there's lifeline, there's kids helpline and some others.. as well as some supports listed on the SANE site here.