To Hell and Back

Hey @LostAngel I totally understand the feeling. No joke, it was a huge thing for me, believing I was unloveable and that I'd never have a partner who loved me. Few years in therapy definitely helped, but it also required me to stop putting soooo much 'mental stock' into the idea of finding a romantic partner.

I totally understand how lonely and isolating it can feel. But you can totally find someone, or someone might just find you! I used to be very insecure in my relationships but have worked very hard on my attachment issues - both internally, and through how I relate to others (and in therapy too of course) and things have improved a lot. Still got recovery work to do but I just wanna say, that if I can do it, you can too 🤞 I believe in you!

It will probably be a bit of time of mourning for the loss of this relationship, and I imagine that thoughts about never finding love might be a bit stronger/more prevalent during this time, but I reckon it will ease off as you heal and move on.

Hey @LostAngel im really sorry for late reply. i was out of country. i really apologize for that. Its not true. you will get your best partner at best time. im more than 100 percent sure of that. There is no exact age for that. The best person will come in exact time and you will have a beautiful family with lovely caring husband and children. For that to come you should be strong now. Just give up all fraud relationship and wait for best.

So sorry to hear this and how it has affected u , I can see your worry about the authorities turning up and the depth of deception is mind blowing, I sincerely hope u can find a good outcome.

thank you @Tilz @Henry2 I appreciate the understanding, as for now well Im dealing with the fraud relationship absence ,in truth Things fully imploded in recent days as a result of me arguing with him ,anyway since then Im dealing with a type of lonileness and yet also a sense of freedom in having a sense of control or a sense of security of my life ,yes it took me this long to stand upto the fraudster and to stand up for myself,Im trying to take one step at a time although Im still profoundly worried about the prospect of trying to find the right man to be with ,I am trying to self soothe ,self care and only do as much as I can handle to do per day ,distractions,distractions,I will get there eventually although of course my mental health has been upsy downsy as of late ,I am really gratefull to have people on these forums showing kindness and empathy so I can in turn remember to be kind to myself thank you friends

Hey @LostAngel ,

Your resilience and strength really shines through. It sounds like such a horrible situation to find yourself in, yet you have fought on.

We are sitting with you. Please know you are not going through this alone.

thank you @tyme today has been a little difficult with pangs of getting used to the absence of phone messages its difficult but I try to keep reminding myself of the facts that he used someone elses information to fool me,loneleness its never easy to be lonely but I recognise that same lonliness only makes me go for the wrong types of men, will keep trying to drown it out with movie watching and food ,its difficult I have to adjust now to the phone staying silent and somehow I need to find a way forward just doing things bit by bit ,self care and distractions,distractions,fill the space fill the void ,eventually move on ,lets hope the next man I meet is going to be good for me and to me hope its third times the charm , thanks for being here

We are here for you @LostAngel

As long as you love yourself, things will fall into place.

You deserve so much better. Hugs.

please excuse the few days Hiatus Ive been trying to distract but also come to terms with and process thoughts ,thankfully Mothers day was a welcome distraction (spending time with my mum and family) which was a kind of relief in a way even allowed myself to laugh ,it was a good day,therre have been thoughts running through my head that feel more like questions or a tiny bit of letting go ,the questions are Did he win ? or did I win? is there closure? then part of me wanted to cry the other night but instead held tears back, I guess slowly moving on in my own way, only one issue though hes messaged today first time in a week after the imploding ,best to ignore most likely I mean whats the point I know hes not real ,in a way the last few days Ive convinced myself to detach emotionally and just look at the situation with the cold hard facts ,I mean its either that or confront but I dont think thats wise nesides I know He never wanted a relationship he just wanted someone foolish enough to waste their time and money on him probly to fund some lavish lyfestyle from stealing peoples hearts ,affection and time ,one thing that has helped me is the self care and also just thinking of things that would give me a sense of comfort ,especially going back in memory to things that worked to comfort my inner child ,music is especially comforting it definetly hurts a persons self esteem ,so im trying to relish in these little things that bring enjoyment again

@LostAngel Of course follow selfcare first. you should be strong to face everything in future. Everything in past is courage that make you strong and make you ready for future. You will get the best person and the one who love you most.