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A Poem? Maybe?

A Poem? Maybe?

Hurt, Lost, Broken

My life is in tatters, my dreams have crumbled around me

I had the life, i had it all

How did i fail

How did i fall

Cruising through life, using everything i could

To keep myself moving

To keep myself high

The ups are fantastic, the best place to be

Altho i could never see the disease

The illness taking over me

No treatment

No plan

No help

Just searching for the high that evaded me

Using this drug and that

To maintain that happy place

When in reality

I was just wasting space

Broken and tired

My life in ruins

How stupid of me to believe

That i was as fantastic as i could be

Tortured now, by the memories

The lows, so low some will never know

How quickly life changes

When everything crumbles and falls in a heap

Now i am lonely

Now i am unloved

Now i have no peace

No place

No love from the one i hurt so much

I still miss her dearly

And altho i know we will never be

I can always hope it untrue

A dream to awaken from

Faith only blames me

Treatment only dulls me

Pain is all i feel

Hate of myself is all i can think

Why did i not notice

How could i not see

Why did this happen

Unanswered questions just for me

The hardest part of it all

Is knowing i will never get to say goodbye

To those who were closest to me

All hope is lost

No freedom for me

Forever trapped in this hellhole

I hope not for an eternity

Thank you

Sorry i just needed to write

376 replies

371 - 376 of 376

In response to: A Poem? Maybe?

Re: A Poem? Maybe?

@Loopy

It's Anne ...justanother47yr

I changed my name because I turned 48.

Missed you x

In response to: Re: A Poem? Maybe?

Re: A Poem? Maybe?

I have been in a hole I dug to hide

I made the sides round and smooth

I hide it well so no one could find

I sent out my shell in the outside to dwell

So no one would look for this meaning less being

I hid away and lock out all

Now I think I want out as with me I cant live

I tell myself I am worthy to live than argue the point where we nolonger talk

I want out but I cut of all now no one even looks

I call I scream even in my dreams

Even there no replys come

Have really dug my hole to deep

Did I not see the pain was too much

Did I not know that people I need

Something I missed that I know now is utter dispare

Some please reach into my pit

Reach out a hand and we could just sit watch the sky

We dont need to talk not in the first

I have been too far away for far to long

I know there must be a path that I can follow

I just need someone who can help me find that path

I shut off all i stopped wanting to be but now known that was wrong

I want to come back but I dont know how

Scorpion

In response to: Re: A Poem? Maybe?

Re: A Poem? Maybe?

@SCORPION - powerful imagery and metaphor, the deep hole indeed. I can really relate to the deep hole and the sending out of my shell into the world. We are split indeed. I hope your two parts reunite in love and understanding. May someone reach in, and may you reach out.

I have turned that deep hole that I also dwell in (from time to time) into a 'love bunker' when things are really tough I imagine this...


(c) Michael Leunig

In response to: A Poem? Maybe?

Re: A Poem? Maybe?

Oh......
@MoonGal lovely response

In response to: Re: A Poem? Maybe?

Re: A Poem? Maybe?

Leunig is great he has a interesting twist on life .I might att a coffee pot and a banksia flower to my hole thanks for the kind words.
Scorpion

In response to: Re: A Poem? Maybe?

Re: A Poem? Maybe?

Slowly down the path Scorpion walks looking but no longer seeing

sences dulled by medication and life step by step but not progressing

darkness in the distance darkness in the past no light shines on this path

just a dull glow of life.

slowly a figure of a child comes into view as he approches a dim recolection of scorpions start to this

journey is recalled and lost in a flash.

The child looks familiar in a strange way but scorpion cant place why is it maybe the sadness in this childs eyes or the lost look on his face.

never mind scorpion continuies on going nowhere.

the child just stops and askes "WHY" ?

Starteld scorpion stops stares "WHY"

then sees it is himself oh so long ago what do you tell yourself to avoid the present.

We did not choose this path i have tried so many time's to find a light to some other path but we always end up here .

DARKNESS AHEAD DARKNESS IN THE PAST.

We hide for awhile crawl out to see if the world has changed but no it never changes.

Let scorpion tread his path undisturbed unseen unheard.

His ghost will front the world and show a presents so he can hide and stay safe from its accusing gaze.

Safe from himself he continues on going nowhere.

Scorpion

371 - 376 of 376