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A Poem? Maybe?

katoSenior Contributor10 Dec 2014, 7:17 pm AEDT

A Poem? Maybe?

Hurt, Lost, Broken

My life is in tatters, my dreams have crumbled around me

I had the life, i had it all

How did i fail

How did i fall

Cruising through life, using everything i could

To keep myself moving

To keep myself high

The ups are fantastic, the best place to be

Altho i could never see the disease

The illness taking over me

No treatment

No plan

No help

Just searching for the high that evaded me

Using this drug and that

To maintain that happy place

When in reality

I was just wasting space

Broken and tired

My life in ruins

How stupid of me to believe

That i was as fantastic as i could be

Tortured now, by the memories

The lows, so low some will never know

How quickly life changes

When everything crumbles and falls in a heap

Now i am lonely

Now i am unloved

Now i have no peace

No place

No love from the one i hurt so much

I still miss her dearly

And altho i know we will never be

I can always hope it untrue

A dream to awaken from

Faith only blames me

Treatment only dulls me

Pain is all i feel

Hate of myself is all i can think

Why did i not notice

How could i not see

Why did this happen

Unanswered questions just for me

The hardest part of it all

Is knowing i will never get to say goodbye

To those who were closest to me

All hope is lost

No freedom for me

Forever trapped in this hellhole

I hope not for an eternity

Thank you

Sorry i just needed to write

376 replies

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In response to: A Poem? Maybe?

peaceSenior Contributor29 Dec 2014, 10:38 am AEDT

Re: A Poem? Maybe?

You need me I need you
We're birds of the same feather
Me and you
We share and care
All day thru
And in the dark of the night
Our tears we shed are true
A pool of sadness we do share
Mopped away in the morning light
By the golden rays
Of each other sunlight.

In response to: A Poem? Maybe?

katoSenior Contributor29 Dec 2014, 11:59 am AEDT

Re: A Poem? Maybe?

@PeppiPatty

I have to apologise, i was just reading through this post, and i realised that i did not acknowledge your words to me, i thought i had but i realise i haven't.

I am glad that it helped you remember your loss and that you like what i write

i know i can sometmes get a bit carried away with writing too much.

but thank you thank you for being a part of my journey as i am a part of yours

thank you

In response to: Re: A Poem? Maybe?

katoSenior Contributor29 Dec 2014, 2:19 pm AEDT

Re: A Poem? Maybe?

that is beautiful
thank you for sharing peace

In response to: A Poem? Maybe?

Alessandra1992Senior Contributor29 Dec 2014, 11:19 pm AEDT

Re: A Poem? Maybe?

@peace

What kato said! Lovely poem..

In response to: Re: A Poem? Maybe?

PeppiPattySenior Contributor30 Dec 2014, 5:41 pm AEDT

Re: A Poem? Maybe?

My dearest Kato,
.i do like your writing. As a matter of fact, I need to respond to you in that....you write your feelings .......rich writing...and it feels like little green shoots are happening for you, mixed up with already long grown grass of knowing yourself.
I write it as it is. But what would you write in that you are teaching others, younger/not as wise/more confused ?

In response to: Re: A Poem? Maybe?

katoSenior Contributor30 Dec 2014, 7:18 pm AEDT

Re: A Poem? Maybe?

hey @PeppiPatty

I am not sure what i would write for others, i can not find the words for what might help, at the moment, i only seem to be able to write from my own perspective and how i feel or am going through.... i struggle to find what might help someone else,

all i do is hope someone see's something nice or relatable in my words and can realize the hope that i sometimes have, that they may not be able to find the words themselves to write but can find it in mine, it is through that i hope i can help someone else

In response to: Re: A Poem? Maybe?

katoSenior Contributor30 Dec 2014, 7:24 pm AEDT

Re: A Poem? Maybe?

A glimmer of light in the darkest of nights

a hopefull gleam of the brightest sheen

That one single star of hope is there

blessed we are, able to be seen

never alone, no matter how we feel

help is available, for those who don't know

the simplest of tasks are sometimes the hardest

but the hope goes on regardless

we feel your pain, we know the troubles

you will not be alone on your travels

In response to: A Poem? Maybe?

Alessandra1992Senior Contributor30 Dec 2014, 8:17 pm AEDT

Re: A Poem? Maybe?

The simplest tasks are sometimes the hardest..
@kato..genius!
Hope does go on regardless...

In response to: Re: A Poem? Maybe?

PeppiPattySenior Contributor30 Dec 2014, 8:39 pm AEDT

Re: A Poem? Maybe?

Kato,
Ille need to read it all again, Ille need to focus and can't at the moment.
If you maybe separate yourself a little inside the pain bit

To the

the 'glimmer of light.'
Or
help is available.

Can you find another avenue inside yourself that is clean from pain and

Like, you are just sitting??

I am looking at this poem and it feels good, really good
But a bit too much like the teacher, not your beautiful self.

Can you understand??

In response to: Re: A Poem? Maybe?

katoSenior Contributor30 Dec 2014, 10:23 pm AEDT

Re: A Poem? Maybe?

i can't seem to separate from my pain at all, it is always there, i try and dull it out, or ignore it, but can't, and i have to admit this last one was a little bit more forced then the others.... not just an outpouring but a directed effort.
i spent some time dissecting it and putting it together which i haven't done before, which is why it would seem different to the others, hence too much like the teacher and not my normal style
thank you ja47

thank you sandy, for me those two lines just fitted

thank you

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