The gift of giving too much *session closed*

Thanks @NikNik!

Yes, It’s the time of year again, where everything seems to get hectic, and time feels scarce. I’m not sure about everyone else, but no matter how much I try to prepare, time seems to just suddenly disappear. Planning something that is supposed to be fun and relaxing gets stressful. Getting presents, dealing with crowds, organizing travel, life admin, catching up with friends (is it me but has anyone else wondered why does everyone want to catch up before Xmas, like there’ll be no time in the new?)

I am just buggered. Just tired. And when I get this way, I can’t help but get fixated on little things, and I get snappy about little things. It starts to impact on my relationships. Last night, this is what I find particularly challenging around this time of year. I noticed that on the poll most people say the 'Xmas is more stress than it's worth'. I'm keen to hear why people feel that way? @GivingMick, @Polyanna @Alessandra1992 @Snoo @Espoir could you share some thoughts to get this conversation going?

I think it's more stress than it's worth, and find it hard to remember what festive season is really about. People seem to get into a frenzy this time of year. I find social demands this time of year is exhausting. Like you CherryBomb, I think most people place a lot of emphasis on wanting to meet before the year ends. I don't know why. I'd really just love to go away on a remote island and tend to my own needs after a hectic year of work, caring, and just life in general.

I agree. Trying to catch up with people before Christmas is the pits. Luckily for me we live in a rural area that is generally laid back and not quite so fraught.

I am exhausted though. My DH has been on the edge for three weeks now and as a result I've been walking on eggshells. I'm totally exhausted by trying to be as strong as everyone thinks I should be. I've spent almost half the past week in tears as he keeps walking all over my boundaries.

@BeHappy, I'm glad I'm not the only one who feels the pre-end of year social rush. Sounds like you're really in need of some down time (as with me). Got any plans on how you might gain some time to yourself?

I hear you @Cazzie.

The Christmas season is a stressor for my partner too. Is it a stressor for your DH?

CherryBomb - a five minute cuppa every now and then will have to do me until sometime in the new year. I'm going away the family so it's going to BUSY.

That's a wonderful point @Alessandra1992 - managing the pressure we put on ourselves to manage FOMO.

Did you find that there were any challenges with disappointing others about not being able to spend as much time with them? I think I'm speaking of my FOD (fear of disappointing).

@Cazzie, things sound tense at home for you. It's tough when people bush our boundaries. I find when this happens, re-establishing by following with through with an action can help. For instance. If I have a friend that has an issue with drinking. I could communicate that I don't like being around when they drink. If they continue to drink around me, I will respond by removing myself from that particular situation. Does that make sense?

For me it's the drinking. A family member we (my family) cares for has a huge problem with drinking and has depression. He has time off work this time of year for two weeks, and in that time he sits in front of TV and does nothing but drink. He accuses people of all sorts of things that aren't real, and we are embarrassed to take him out to social events. It becomes a situation where the family is 'lock down' for Christmas, where we need to watch this person to ensure he does not hurt himself (he has self-harmed before when drunk). I dread this time of year because this but I get through knowing that it's only a few weeks until things return to 'normal'... whatever that is.