The kids were great today @Faith-and-Hope - a complete 360 from yesterday so that was pleasing. We had some interruptions to our afternoon but they were good interruptions. One of the mum's brought a friend into the school with a baby lamb ...only a few days old. He was gorgeous and the kids got to feed him his bottle and then walk around outside with him. We also had their usual teacher come in at the end of the day to give out some questionnaires for something she is working on. All of that happened last minute so I packed up the kids early.
I am trying not to stress about the birdhouses - going to spend most of tomorrow getting as many done as we can. I don't have any duties so can work through recess and lunch as well.
I need to go out tonight to get some money out - my pay doesn't go in until later tonight and I am completely out of money. I need petrol (have been on empty for 2 days) and a few other things that will get me through the next couple of days until I can do a bigger shop.
My main aim tonight is to get through it. I knew this afternoon would be hard but didn't realise it was being presented by someone from the organisation I have been working with on Suicide Awareness ...then there was the expected triggers that I think I dealt with okay at the time. I did find myself 'wandering off' and 'playing with my hands' - 2 things I do when I am stressed or triggered. I think I hid it well enough though and got out of there as soon as it was finished ...didn't say goodbye to anyone - actually avoided everyone so it would not have been noticeable. The first thing I wanted to do when I got home was numb the pain but I have stopped myself doing that - hour by hour tonight.
