We had a good DBT session today @Faith-and-Hope - lots of laughter and really funny moments. It is a really lovely group and we all seem to have a good sense of humour. There is probably no surprise that I often lead the jokes and frivolity lol - it was certainly that way today. At one stage one of the members commented that the facilitator had lost control of the group and she just laughed - we were all laughing. It made some pretty intense stuff a little easier to get through though. We do work well as a group and that is nice to have.
Saw my pdoc after and most of what we talked about today was work and all my own self-doubts. We talked a little about it always being that way but with this new school I am having less of those in relation to my work. I think it is harder not having my own class in a way but also a good thing I don't because I have less of those pressures with planning and reporting. We also talked about the behaviour management side of things and how much easier it is with this school. Most of what I used to do at the old school was managing behaviours and teaching came secondary so there have been those doubts about whether I could do that side of it. The more I get to know the other teachers and the more I am in classes the more I think I can do this job - I hope that continues to increase because my confidence in myself is pretty low.
Friend was going to come around this afternoon but is unwell - I am very tired again today so I am not disappointed - it will mean I can take my time to clean up and relax when I need to. I am actually relieved he can't make it - maybe that is also a sign that things are becoming a little more distant between us and I don't think I am overly concerned about that. I didn't want him to think I was distancing myself from him after what he told me several weeks ago but maybe I am subconsciously doing that - it has also aligned with me starting back at work and him selling his house so maybe it is just circumstances. I suppose time will tell but I feel like we are certainly on different paths now and maybe that is how it is going to be. I honestly feel okay about that - firstly I thought it was just me pulling away as I usually do when I start getting close to someone but we have also both had so much going on and haven't had the time to connect properly. I am trying not to overthink it and what will be will be.
@CheerBear @Former-Member
