Rant

Don't apologise for the rant @Eden1919 . We all need to "let it out somewhere" sometimes. I hope it helped a little at least

Greetings. I understand, I know and I feel tired again just reading your post. Mate, I have managed to avoid continued medication, but I must deal with my overloaded mind. I don't mind chatting with myself and querying whether I'm right or wrong. The solidarity for me is the pure logic. So, am I really the one needing "help"? As for the sleep issues, absolutely,.. I'm lucky to rough sleep (constant wake ups) for maybe 2-3 hours at a go. My body n mind appreciates occasional attacks of alcohol.. push through the weird stuff.. and a half decent sleep ensues; normally 6-8 hrs. Still slightly rough, but, amongst the torment, it recuperates me enough for the next few days.

I'm well aware this world is what's considered normal. I have major disagreement with this acceptance, but, it is not mine. So, I keep a generally low profile nowadays, just smile and nod when "they" insist I'm the problem, and pretend I agree.

It's relatively easy to co-exist in an otherwise alien surround when you accept that the "medication", more often, is "given" to people that simply do not fit the status quo of the accepted majority.

How else could we explain a history and modern continuance of volatile laws and social behaviour? In my nearly 5 decades, i've witnessed and studied numerous illogical adjustments to legislation and social acceptance. And remember,.. It's always someone else's fault, but don't ever admit you're aware of that white lie to the so-called greater good. Lol

Hi @Eden1919

So nice to hear from you.

Never apolgise for a rant. Rant away as much as you need too. It's so good to get all our thoughts out of our head and this is a great place to do it.

I can hear in your words that you want things to get better which is great. I'm also acknowledging how hard that is for you at the moment. I hope things can improve for you.

Take care and remember, ranting is good for us!

Hello @Eden1919 I lived the same way as you are on a depot for 8 years. I was sick and exhausted beyond measure and could barely do anything. I was on a CTO (community treatment order) and demonstrated to the mental health review board that I had insight and would be compliant and got taken off depot and put on another self administered medication.

I had to cure myself from all the health problems the depot medication caused. I went to www.curezone.org to begin with which is health advocacy support and did most of the things they recommended on that site. I attended all kinds of other free online health summits and I also do free health audios off of Sapien Medicine's you tube channel.

I am now fighting fit and walk an hour a day. Gone down many dress sizes and am now happy with my life as it is. I still take my medication and have not really required a shrink except for medication review with diabetes however could no come off my med anyway.

It can be done, just sending you encouragement. My life was a mess on depot. You can do it! Just ask to challenge your CTO and be compliant get put on a more tolerable med and start your healing process.

Hey @Eden1919 You are always welcome to rant here. I'm hearing how incredibly frustrating it is for you to be on depot. I have also had times when things have been out of my control and it's not a nice feeling, I can understand feeling like you want a break from it all.

It sounds like your sleep is impacted and you're tired of the irregular sleep patterns and feeling exhausted all the time. I struggle when my sleep is disturbed, so I can relate to that as well.

I can hear how hard you are trying to look after yourself and do better but you feel like it's so hard. I'm wondering if you have told your care team about how you are feeling? Perhaps there is something they can adjust or can support you in a different way.

I really hope things ease for you, I can hear how much you are struggling and although I can't fix it, I just want you to know we are here with you and holding onto hope for you 💝

Hey @Eden1919 Its been a long time since we chatted.

Sorry to hear you are having side effects from depot. Is there any room for discussion with doctor to titrate and shift meds as @Former-Member explained she was able to do.

Wow @Former-Member what an amazing story. I will look at that cure zone.

My situation was beyond hope @Appleblossom. Curezone is a start, its an old forum when dial up was around. Its mainly led by advocates and moderated by accredited healers. Theres lots of information there but like I said it was an old forum and used to move slowly. I don't know how much activity is there now, it looked as if it had gone quiet. Health Summits are pretty cool. You sign up and you get to watch health videos within a free time window. So its no cost to you. Most of it is up to date cutting edge information. I wouldn't recommend going on a depot. I've seen other people on it over the years and they had the same issues as myself and @Eden1919. It drains the lifeforce energy from your body and robs you of any quality of life. It is a very powerful and toxic med.

Good afternoon. That, like, sounds a wee bit horrid. I've never been attacked by the depot shot, but, I had a friend on it.. andhe said similar. He reckoned it drained him of all care and particularly.. which really annoyed him.. of all fight, for anything. So, I honestly can't say I fully understand, but, does that shot basically mute a person as for being somewhat sentient?

I figured a long time ago most plants are sentient, as they (some) have the ability to understand colour, geometry, touch, etc. I really could not properly comprehend the loss of my faculties as an aware human simply due to medication.

I mean, I am well aware that schizophrenia grants (view dependent) me an alternate perception and opinions of many things, but...

That, to me, is edging on a viscious level of control/slavery. No sir.. I don't like it.

🤨

thanks for the support everyone i dont think i can change medications for a couple of reasons one is that i have tried heaps of meds before and they all came with horrible side effects and some didnt even help at all so i doubt they will take me off what i am on and also i am horrible at taking oral meds i forget all the time and have tried reminders and such but they dont work for me either. so i am a bit stuck tbh maybe very stuck anyway i doubt they will let me come off the depot even if i try and convince them i am willing to take oral meds i hate being on a treatment order.

Well maybe they can titrate it down due to side effects. @Eden1919

They all have side effects, I would be more impressed if they were giving you actual therapeutic strategies and insights, rather than just meds.... meds should only be a temp help while working on life.

They used to have this idea of ... being on a med for a life but that is getting less fashionable these days.

I talked son's docs to down amount by 100 mg cant say which med, but we are working on it right now.

@Former-Member My son's situation has me as fierce mumma bear as advocate for him.

@Eniac Too right ... sad but true ... I have known a few people on depot from when they first dreamed it up ... hmmm .... such is my life. Lucky I am not on it ... but I have to almost run down the road starkers to get any attention ... lol... can we laugh about the madness of this workd sometime.

Not meaning to dismiss the seriousness of what you are going through Eden ... but do your ressearch, as we have an internet these days ... and look for some therapies that speak to you as possible and meaningful, and try and get you 'health' team on board.