Hello 👋

Hi @louisa694

I'm so sorry you're feeling so low. I can really hear the pain in your post. It's really hard when you are shy but wish you could be more social. Being social is so helpful for our self-esteem. It gets us out of our own heads and forces us to think of others. I was such a shy kid so can really relate. I don't have a wide group of friends now but have a wonderful few.

Can you think of any ways you could gain some socialisation? Maybe an interest you have such a hobby. You may be able to find a group that you could join that does this hobby.

What does your ideal life look like?

I hope you find some friendship and support here. The forums are great for that.

Keep reaching out,

Hanami

From an attachment theory point of view, "shyness" is kind of one and the same with the assumption of internal emotional responsibility. Or, shyness is working things out on the inside.

I can see you internally regulating with "I feel soo grumpy for no reason at all". Shortly after that, I see you questioning that systems limitations with "there shouldn’t be any reason why I should be depressed but I just am". I'm learning that it's ok to not always have a explanations or justifications for feeling things. Seems like you're learning something similar.

Hi @hanami

My husband has lots of friends. Every time he gets invited to go out somewhere he usually goes out without me because I too scared and depressed of going out. All I feel like doing is staying at home and relaxing.
I know this isn’t good for me. I need to socialise a little bit. Maybe going out my husbands friends might help.

I enjoy walking and nature.

That’s a great idea and a good way to socialise.

I want to have kids eventually when the time is right. I want to travel. I like travelling.

I just want to be happy and healthy.

I signed up to the forum last week and I’m loving it. Everyone is soo friendly and supportive which is great.

Hey @louisa694 ,

Great to have you with us. It sounds like you are juggling with a few different things right now. I'm glad you hear you are interested in travelling.

Anywhere in particular? Have you been on a cruise before?

Hello @louisa694 👋 I'm also a very shy person that wants to become more confident. Sometimes when I'm trying to be confident I feel like such a fraud and that any hope of gaining confidence disappears. But I think it is possible to get there, bit by bit. Even posting here on the forums is a great step.

@tyme

I love New Zealand and Tasmania. I never been on a cruise before but I would love to go on one.

@june23

I just wish I was more talkative and I can hold a conversation. I can’t hold a conversation with friends and I’m thinking maybe that why I don’t have many friends and also sometimes when I do talk, I can come across being rude but I don’t mean it because of my responses to things are very short.

Maybe it's an all-in-one - Cruise to Tassie or New Zealand @louisa694 .

As for talking to people. I'm not really good in real life either. You know what? I actually use these forums as a practice ground for socialising in real life. That's what drew me to these forums in the first place. And I've never turned back. I began with using the forums, then volunteering and now working for SANE. It's been the best thing - EVER!

@tyme

My main goal for joining the forum is to gain confidence and express my thoughts and feelings to people and share with people what I’m going through and try and help other people as well who are going through similar circumstances. I’m glad I have your support 🙂

Morning @louisa694

how is your sunday going my friend