Winter solstice

Hey @NatureLover

and thinking of it as a trauma journey ... has so much better outcomes ... than the old mental illness models and scary ...and its genetic ... hysteria and assumptions that went along with those ways of thinking. Anyway I endured all that from 50 year years ago and did some of the science ... so appreciate ... the journey ... and the recognition that trauma has played a role in MH outcomes.

@Dimity your friendship is valued by me.

Thanks @NatureLover . Yes I hope the treatments help, but it might be overambitious to think it's a new phase - every time I try for a new start there's another setback, and there were a couple today. My sister isn't doing well. And a gp clinic I tried isn't taking new patients.

I hope the trauma therapy unlocks new healing as you say but in the process I'll have to revisit old hurts.

Thanks for caring. It makes a difference.

Hi @Appleblossom . Thanks for your response. Yes with all the nerve thingies if our spine deteriorates a lot else can go wrong. What's an OT - an Occupational Therapist? I remember one helped Dad with various aids and strategies. I'm glad the osteopath took me in hand after I'd been dismissed for so long by my gp. I feel privileged to have been able to afford the MRI.

Indeed me myself, house, garden, relationships, all are Works In Progress. I don't know how we keep going sometimes but for sheer bloody-mindedness. Illegitimi non carborundum.

Keep on keeping on my friend.

@Dimity I am so impressed that you tried for a new GP clinic, despite the obstacles. Hopefully another one will be taking new patients.

I'm sorry your sister isn't doing well 😢

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@Dimity wrote:

I hope the trauma therapy unlocks new healing as you say but in the process I'll have to revisit old hurts.

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Yes, this is the hard part. However, getting validation that what I went through was trauma and abuse really helped me.

Of course I care 💚

@Dimity

ha ha had to look up ... Illegitimi non carborundum... lol

Sometimes it is sheer bloody mindedness, but not for long. I just cant keep that mindset front and centre, my miss pollyanna prefers to rule the roost. Yet I am sure it is what has given me back bone and strength and gradually I am incorporating it more into my personality.

I had an interesting zoom yesterday with a young researcher at my alma mater. I applied to be part of her project. It was almost 2 hours. Some of that 'bloodymindedness' sternness came out in our discussion (cos of trauma context) but she knew better than to escalate and just went with the flow and it subsided pretty quickly.

Backbone, strength and positivity sound a winning combination @Appleblossom .

I've now embarked on a care program with the osteopath so things are looking up. The old bones will need to get used to the floor work. I'm also going to try EMDR with my new psychologist - my psychiatrist says it's alright but doesn't work for everyone.

I'm navigating towards the Christmas lodestar, one of the few times I see relatives. I've lost touch with most so savour the opportunity.

You may be caught up in Christmas concerts and rehearsals. I hope it's all going well.

Yep @Dimity carol service last night, preceded by picnic on lawn with Justice group.

I am glad you have a couple of plans to deal with existing issues. Physical and psych.

Yep have to hit the floor after I finish on Sane. I was trying to avoid it but Nope. Its essential for me, so down I crawl.

At the picnic it was one of the topics of conversation ... getting up from the ground. It is what it is. I many not jump up with energy but the doing of it... keeps us fitter.

Gradually doing my weaning and reducing of time being on Sane. Eventually I am planning on a weekly check in. Still hope to see you around.

Cheers Bella.

Started trauma therapy today. Feeling like a grub. Bad time of year to be starting.

Needing some positives.

Coming up to summer solstice. My material circumstances haven't changed in 6 months. I've started addressing physical and mental health issues but family issues are still too hard.

I'm grateful for relative stability and security and have been plugging away at caring for house and garden as and when I can ɓut it's not enough.

I feel a bit lost.

Hi @Dimity , I think what you're doing IS enough. You are maintaining, and not adding to the clutter but gradually reducing it. I admire you.

Overall, my clutter is growing slowly as I add boxes to the shed. I've added only about 28 boxes over 6 years, but still, it's a burden.

I didn't know you are going to try EMDR with your psychologist. (Or did I forget?) I've heard good things about it.

I'm glad you look forward to catching up with your family at Christmas...I hope it goes well.