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Something’s not right

Funeral

The-red-centaurSenior Contributor

Funeral

A family member of mine died last week. The funeral is on Monday. I'm anxious about seeing the rest of my family. I'm also scared of what feelings will come up. I am going back to a town I spent a lot of my childhood in, a place I haven't been to in 20 years, this also comes with its own anxiety.

I don't know how I'll cope. Tbh I tried to suicide when I heard about the death. I'm safe at the moment, things are just heard, and I have so many feelings I don't understand.

39 replies

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In response to: Funeral

Unknown userMember

Re: Funeral

Hi @The-red-centaur

Very sad time that brings up many emotions when soneone passes.

Thoughts are with you.

Have you got a reason to be worried about going?

If it upsets you and you are unsure of coping, do you really have to go?

In response to: Re: Funeral

The-red-centaurSenior Contributor

Re: Funeral

@Former-Member

It's complicated with my family of origin. There was a lot of trauma in my childhood. Also some of my family has rejected and disowned me due to me being trans and having mh issues.

In response to: Re: Funeral

Unknown userMember

Re: Funeral

Hi @The-red-centaur

I think it falls in the category of a simple list with 2 columns.

Column One. What are the Benefits of going

Column Two. What are the Benefits of not going.

Your mental health has to be on one of the lists.

I hear no family support.

Do you have any friends to support you?

Also do not give up. You may advocate for others in similar situation later on.

I imagine you have had many life experiences that can help others when you are ready

In response to: Re: Funeral

Unknown userMember

Re: Funeral

@The-red-centaur

Maybe 4 columns

Column One. What are the Benefits of going

Column Two. What are the Benefits of not going.

Column Three. How will l feel if l do go.

Column Four. How will I feel if i do not go.

Sometimes we have to look after ourselves first.

That chart will be easy to read and analyse.

Sometimes we overthink without a plan.

In response to: Re: Funeral

NatureLoverSenior Contributor

Re: Funeral

@The-red-centaur wrote:

There was a lot of trauma in my childhood. Also some of my family has rejected and disowned me due to me being trans and having mh issues.

So very sorry to hear this, @The-red-centaur 😞

Will be sending wishes for you that you can cope... 🤞

In response to: Re: Funeral

NatureLoverSenior Contributor

Re: Funeral

@The-red-centaur How did the funeral go, and going back to your home town?

In response to: Funeral

Eve7Senior Contributor

Re: Funeral

Sending love and support @The-red-centaur

❤️❤️

In response to: Re: Funeral

The-red-centaurSenior Contributor

Re: Funeral

Sorry it's taken me a while to respond.

Things have been pretty tough. After the funeral I ended up in hospital and things have really set in. I feel numb. Reverted back to sever self harm after being discharged. My psychiatrist doubled my meds. My step dad has about a week to live and I'm not ready for his death. I dreamt I visited him last night and watched him die. I can't though, He lives in Europe. I wish I could give him my life. I don't want it but that's not how life works so I'm just stuck.

In response to: Re: Funeral

tymeModerator

Re: Funeral

Hi @The-red-centaur ,

I'm sorry to hear how rough things are for you right now. It must be hard for you that you cannot see your step-dad even though he has about a week to live.

Do you have supports in place who you can speak to about what's happening for you?

You deserve to be heard.

In response to: Re: Funeral

Unknown userMember

Re: Funeral

Hi @The-red-centaur

I feel for you.

The last few weeks sound busy and stressful.

I am pleased you wrote again.

Happy to read what is happening

So much still happening

I hope you keep writing

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