My Place

@Glisten he says he is freezing, got blankets and jumpers and under the covers

@Shaz51 BAM! How good am I !

Mr Shaz has a good auto immune system. His body is raising his temperature so that the virus can’t survive. 👍🏼

When he gets better the end of next week. You have to tell me if he changes his mind about removing the gardens. Ok?

Ha ha @Glisten

He will change his mind because removing the gardens is too much work

Everyone tell me how good the gardens look 😃

Dear @Shaz51

That's beautiful that flower - Your lucky to have a lovely garden.

Does Mr Shaz want to concrete part of the garden ? 🏡

he told you he wants to cut part of the garden out  

Just saw your new gardening books @Oaktree They are soooooo cool - I want some 🥰

@AD_SANE_LEM

I have brought you to my little thread to have an off topic discussion with you. I hope you don’t mind?

You said we could ask you about childhood trauma. I lived through childhood trauma myself and I was wondering if you got therapy for yours and if so what kind of therapy. Also did you find the therapy helped you or made it worse? I was supposed to get trauma therapy a couple of years ago but my psychologist backed out and said I wasn’t well enough at the time. In truth it was her and the thought of the trauma therapy that was stressing me out. As soon as she fired me, for want of better words, I felt better!

I would appreciate anything you have to offer on this topic but recognise that it is probably hard to talk about. I would understand if you would rather not.

Thanks

@Oaktree thank you for asking. I did get therapy for mine. I want to stick to the guidelines and cannot recommend any specific therapy. I was extremely grateful that my psychologist had specialisation to support people with trauma. Which was the precursor to me developing OCD and Panic. It wasn't easy - but it was so worth it. My psychologist said the following in our first session together "I don't have a magic wand, I will guide you but unless you (me) are willing to put in the hard work, we will not get anywhere. There will be difficult days and there will be difficult days. If you are ready to put in the hard work then I can help you. Otherwise, therapy may not be for you."

This really helped set the expectation for me. It was a journey about learning about myself, my emotions and acceptance. Acceptance was the hardest but also the turning point in helping me turn the lion into a kitten.

The relationship and connection with a psychologist is super important. Whilst I was lucky to connect with someone in Year 10 (who I still see today), I know this is not the case for everyone. Patience and Persistence - again extremely difficult to practice but reaps lots of rewards. It does take time to find the right match. Because therapy requires trust.

And a key thing for me was learning to speak to the therapist when things weren't working. I wasn't used to this - I was just expecting to go to the psychologist and hoping this worked and if it didn't there was something wrong with me... but communicating with my psychologist helped us work as a team to figure out what other techniques he could bring in to help or try different strategies.

It's an ongoing journey though - I started in Year 9/10 and I still have to work on things even now.

I know I haven't given you simple answers but hopefully something.

Thank you for your answer @AD_SANE_LEM

That was helpful. Especially the bit about difficult days. I know already that I have to put the work in. My experience with my old psychologist left a bad taste in my mouth and I have avoided psychological help since then. My biggest hurdle is trusting someone. I definitely have trust issues. It would take time to find a therapist that is a good match for me. I don’t know if i will pursue trauma therapy but I think it would be helpful for the way I react to things

Yes @Oaktree one really has to be ready for it. For me trust was hard because of the trauma I endured as a child. So therapy helped me a.) understand my emotions (both good and bad ones) b.) what to do when I get the bad emotions and c.) how do I begin trusting people. I had to learn that not everyone is out to get me lol.

But it's a journey and you have to be ready for it.

You could go to the best therapist in the world - but if you're not ready for it, you're not going to get anywhere.

Go gently.