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What do you do when you know you're coming home to someone angry?

JlolSenior Contributor05 Apr 2023, 1:23 pm AEST

What do you do when you know you're coming home to someone angry?

My partner is angry. I don't know what about exactly (I think it's because she's taken holiday leave over Easter and I have not [don't have enough leave accrued]), but I know that I'll be blamed for something when I come home. There will be a big "argument" (I use the term loosely as I don't argue back - I'm not that kind of person) that will probably go on for some hours. She will say some hurtful things to me. I may have a panic attack.

I'm at work now and I feel I'm just counting down the hours until I come home and have to face this.

What do I do to get through the day/survive at home? How do I prepare?

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In response to: What do you do when you know you're coming home to someone angry?

PeregrinefalconSenior Contributor05 Apr 2023, 4:30 pm AEST

Re: What do you do when you know you're coming home to someone angry?

Hey @Jlol

This is such a stressful situation to be in, that sense of dread and anxiety can be awful.

I am by no means an expert in this domain but can certainly relate to feeling overwhelmed in similar situations. I have learnt to take a bit of a 'time out' so to speak - step back and take a break from the conversation if needed when I can feel my emotions becoming heightened. It can be hard to communicate our feelings well when the emotions start to go into overdrive.

In the lead-up: If there is anything that helps take your mind off of it for a little while, or something that helps you feel grounded - that can be good, too.

Also - You don't deserve to be called hurtful things.Emotional abuse is never okay.

Taking a time out/break if your partner starts to use language that is hurtful can be really important. We can't control another's behaviour but we can remove ourselves from it temporarily.

If this is something that is a frequent occurrence, the link above has some further information - Just in case (I could however be completely wrong here and hope that I am)

Really hoping that it goes as smoothly as possible for you - We are here for support

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