Connect with people who understand what you are going through, seek advice and surround yourself with support. We're free, anonymous, and professionally moderated 24/7.

47,612Members
1,358,869Posts
1,400,000Visitors

Welcome and getting started

Toxic cheating

Camf1New Contributor31 Mar 2023, 11:50 pm AEDT

Toxic cheating

Hello,

I am new here but felt I needed an outlet to post. I have been in a relationship for 14 years but for 6 of those I have been cheating on my partner. I have no explanations as to why and always thought I was just toxic and a liar. But this year it came to light that I have borderline personality disorder. Only recently has my partner found out about all my lies and cheating and I feel horrible that I did that. But I also feel like I had no control over myself. I don’t condone what I did and I despise my actions. I just don’t know how to explain to her what I did was all about my own feelings and not her.

3 replies

1 - 3 of 3

In response to: Toxic cheating

BowSenior Contributor01 Apr 2023, 3:16 pm AEDT

Re: Toxic cheating

Is your partner sticking by you? If they are, you are lucky. For their sake and your own, please get help. Get into a psychologist, get the support and learn the tools to stop what you are doing and to better understand yourself.

In response to: Re: Toxic cheating

Camf1New Contributor01 Apr 2023, 3:44 pm AEDT

Re: Toxic cheating

No she has left me. I have been admitted to a day program for bpd

In response to: Re: Toxic cheating

hanamiSenior Contributor05 Apr 2023, 9:39 am AEST

Re: Toxic cheating

Hi @Camf1

It's a good thing you're getting help for your BPD. Is there any chance your partner will forgive you and give your relationship another chance?

I thought these might be helpful for you to have a read of.

Feel free to visit Raising Awareness of BPD - Flipping the Script

or

Topic Tuesday// Borderline Personality Disorder Awareness Week 2022: 'See The Person'// Tues 27th Se...

Warmest wishes

Hanami

1 - 3 of 3

SANE Forums is published by SANE with funding from the Australian Government Department of Health.

SANE Forums does not provide crisis support.
If you need immediate assistance, please see available crisis services.

Learn more about SANE and SANE services at sane.org

Aboriginal flag

Torres Strait Islander flag

Transgender flag

SANE acknowledges the Traditional Owners of Country throughout Australia and recognises the continuing connection to lands, waters and communities. We pay our respect to Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander cultures; and to Elders past and present.

SANE values diversity. We are committed to providing a safe, culturally appropriate, and inclusive service for all people, regardless of their ethnicity, faith, disability, sexuality, or gender identity.

Aboriginal flag

Torres Strait Islander flag

Transgender flag

SANE acknowledges the Traditional Owners of Country throughout Australia and recognises the continuing connection to lands, waters and communities. We pay our respect to Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander cultures; and to Elders past and present.

SANE values diversity. We are committed to providing a safe, culturally appropriate, and inclusive service for all people, regardless of their ethnicity, faith, disability, sexuality, or gender identity.