Happiness guilt

Hi @Jenn4 , happy Christmas...I don't have the bipolar highs, but due to childhood abuse I found it very hard to allow myself to be happy. It took years and was scary, but it worked.

I'm sorry I can't help with allowing yourself to be happy with the bipolar highs, but you have my empathy...

Thankyou @NatureLover , that's very kind and I appreciate it. I hope only good things for you, and am so glad you made it through to unconditional happiness

Thanks for your lovely message @Jenn4 ...I hope you can have hope that you can achieve the unconditional happiness too.

Hi @Jenn4 . Thanks for posting this interesting thread. Merry Christmas to you!

I don’t have bipolar but I can relate to the feelings of being scared to be happy in that when I’m experiencing a period of depression, I find it hard to let people give me help as I feel I’m not worth it. I tend to try and hide these feelings but they eventually come out which makes it harder for me. I think it’s important that you allow yourself to express these emotions knowing that it is okay and also realising that it might not be a bad thing and part of you becoming unwell. Being happy and excited are normal and natural emotions whether you’ve got an illness or not so please don’t be afraid to show and express these feelings. Just be you and don’t be afraid to show your true colours!

Take care!

Judi9877☺️🌻

Hi @Jenn4 Merry Christmas

I totally get what you are saying. I’m only new to this bipolar diagnosis. But if I’m excited and all the rest, I get concerned. They are still trying to find the right combination of meds so I don’t know what moods are real and what are bipolar moods. I went to my MH nurse one day in what I thought was a good mood. She had me at the psychiatrist in 2 days. Apparently I was too happy!

I can’t help you but I can understand

Also there is this thread Let's talk about bipolar

Captain24

Thankyou @NatureLover , best.

@Judi9877 , that makes sense. Thankyou for your encouragement and I hope for only good things for you. All the best - let your happiness out without fear too!

@Captain24 Yes! How good, the solidarity! Firstly, a warm welcome to the bipolar-people-who-know-they’re-bipolar community. It’s a great community and very beneficial to be part of for a whole range of reasons. Being recently told you’re bipolar is hard! I was told I was bipolar at the end of 2018, so it’s fresh but not very fresh in my case. I don’t see it (despite the evidence in my original post that this frame does tarry) as there being “”normal”” moods and “bipolar moods”. It’s not ternary, like depressed us, “”normal”” us, and manic us; it’s all us. To me, there are no ‘bipolar moods’ and ‘real moods’, logically that checks out in my head, but I don’t truly truly believe it. It’s hard! I don’t know the answer! I’ll post this question in the thread you linked, maybe someone will be able to help us there

I couldn't work out how to post it in the thread, but I found some people to tag. Thanks guys, hope you don't mind the tag. I've spoken to some of you before.

@Olga @NewbieBipolar @frog @Mazarita @Shaz51 @Meowmy @Bunniekins @thedispiontment

Any ideas on this front?

Love and peace only,

Jenn4

Please tag other bipolar people too as you like, I love talking to other bipolar people.

Thanks @Jenn4. It’s good when people ‘get it’. I was diagnosed about 4 months ago. The psychiatrist is still playing around with meds to get the right combination.

I like the way you say the moods are us not bipolar. Looking back over my life I can see the signs.

I actually ran into a lady, I use to work with, yesterday and we got talking. I told her about my bipolar and she just laughed and said she could have told me that 10 years ago!

Hi @Jenn4 @Dimity @TAB

What an interesting thread. I’m also bipolar so can relate.

In my own experience I can say that there is and enormous amount of stigma around the illness. And those well intended don’t readily understand what it means. Some see themselves as a self-appointed guardian who can gauge whether you’re sick or not, which is to some extent disingenuous and superior. Others use it as a”go-to” to explain away almost every emotion you display rather than consider whether this is just you….and it’s hard to push back when you start to become confused yourself.

So my thoughts on what to do in the here and now? The scenario you’ve described suggests that you’re “out there” in disclosure. Are you perhaps introducing yourself as bipolar (when it often isn’t relevant) rather than just running with plain old you? I don’t personally think as a bipolar that I have an obligation to keep everyone informed. I’ve pretty much disclosed as much as I’m going to these days (not anticipating to need to any further at this stage) but offer this as food for thought only.

In terms of finding whether you are “truly” happy I can say that when I’m hypomania or manic there are often physical symptoms (wildly increased energy levels etc). Noting this trend I’ve had to train myself into first assuming that I’m just plain happy…and take it from there…

Let me know what you think. I’m very concerned for you and happy to exchange ideas.

Hello @Jenn4 it's a good question. Self-doubt is inevitable if/when we're invalidated or come to know our emotions may be regarded as pathological. You have to trust yourself in the core of your being and finding that centre is IMHO one of the most important things we can do. For some it may be spiritual, for others experiential.

I'll tag you into Let`s talk about Bipolar .

Thanks for tagging me @Delicatessen .