LostAngelSenior Contributor
Stuck on Treadmill /getting myself back together again
Hello everyone again its been a while since being on the Forums ,been stuck on this lifes treadmill so to speak ,Isolation,depression,Anxiety and Overthinking ,due to being at home far too long, no own transport currently which has particially caused a mess of things,I had times where I stated to get frustrated and start crying but then strangely enough I told myself eve when feeling so low that I had to get back up and not stay there,Honestly todays been a big improovement cause Ive had to just decide to get things back on track,I had a terrible nights sleep though so had to catch up on sleep early today,but then did one thing at a time,hot shower,eat breakfast,cups of tea,ring back a few phone calls I had avoided dealing with for about a week ,made my bed,did some washing,downloaded yet another mental health wellbeing type app,Talked to relatives on phone just the other day,and trying to stay awake instead of going back to bed,I do feel Ive acheived more today than most days recently I also though am concerned about long distance relationship that may be suffering as a result of me feeling stuck in my current circumstances of social isolation,cause hes pretty much had to be the strong one and kind of carry me through some pretty hard days ,I also have possible seperation anxiety from not being with him in person as wed both like to be together in person and are working on that happening in next few months,I just have to get myself back together,but hes also been there alot honestly not sure I would got through those hard days without him,hes my one and only and he knows that,he knows about my previous abusive relationship issues,he knows practiclly everything ,I hope he doesnt feel underappreciated at times and I hope Im not burdening him at other times ,the distance isnt easy but so worth it,I just have to be patient in a number of ways ,as he keeps lifting me up ,I wish I wasnt a burden but he doesnt see it that way he sees me as his responsibilty to protect,reasure and be there for,Life is definetly about patience ,I hope he doesnt lose patience with me think ill leave it there for now
