Not Coping

Dam that sucks @tyme

That is why I’m getting all four out I had braces too, but three of mine are coming through and they hurt.

Yeah, I feel i went through all the braces 'torture' over 7 years long, only to now have my teeth off centre! @Birdofparadise8 .

The only reason I got my 2 wisdom teeth out was because it was partially erupted and the skin kept getting infected.

Do you know if wisdom teeth roots continue to grow throughout your life? I've heard this, but I'm not sure.

Oh I’m not sure @tyme I have no clue sorry.

May I ask you a question how long did you take to get better with your mental health?

I’m over feeling like this.

It took about 15-16 years @Birdofparadise8 - it wasn't short! And I think that's why I do so much now. I believe I missed out on over a decade of like. It feels like I'm making up for it now.

That's why I want to help you as much as possible so that you don't need to take as long as i do. I think I needed the maturity before I really was ready to heal.

Before, I always said I wanted to get better because I was hurting all the time... but I think deep down, I wasn't ready to make the changes I eventually ended up making...

Oh okay I did relise it took you that long.

Thank you @tyme I wonder how long it will take for me. I hope I’m not going to be depressed for that long 7 months has been 7 months too long.

I was in a terrible terrible way for 15 years @Birdofparadise8 . I really feel like I missed out on life. So from my late teenage-hood to early adult hood. I wanted to die every day because the pain was so real.... But I didn't.

And I know I'm alive for a reason - to give hope to others. So be prepared for a long ride. Just DON'T give up! There IS a reason to live. @Birdofparadise8

You wanted to die too @tyme that some how gives me a little comfort in knowing you got through the other side then. I just hope I can get there too. Suicidal ideation is scary and comforting at the same time if you get what I mean and a daily struggle to not give in.

Did I tell you I still have suicidal ideation everyday? That's just part of my condition. However, it doesn't have the front seat, and it has now become background noise. I don't 'entertain' the thought because if i do, it comes to the forefront of my mind. @Birdofparadise8

I used to get upset because I wished these thoughts away. Then, my psychologist said, "Just leave them there! Otherwise you'll be always thinking about the very thing you don't want to think about!"

So there is was... I left the thoughts as they were. I let them come. I let them go. Meh? I don't even care about those thoughts anymore. Because I know these thoughts are not my behvavious.

I can’t remember sorry @tyme

It’s hard to just leave them though. I don’t know if I could let them float in and out.

Yes it is hard @Birdofparadise8 - it feels very unnatural. But after a lot of training and practice, it does actually make a difference.

I'll be off shortly. I'll see you later in the week. I think Wed evening or something. I'll tag you when I'm on next.