Not Coping

today is day two of this residential mental health program, and I’ve cried so much today over absolutely nothing.

crying over other peoples stories (ok that’s fair, they were very familiar to mine and it gave me hope that things will get better)

crying over a group activity on food (because apparently I still get triggered by eating etc god damnit)

crying over our group dinner outing (to be fair it was right after that group session and I was getting overwhelmed by having to chose what to get for dinner)

crying over doing a strengths/values exercise, and getting help with it from one of the workers who was an absolute gem dealing with me sobbing that I don’t feel like I have many strengths.

I know I’m in the right place, and getting all the help I need but i don’t think I’m coping. who’d have thought dealing with my mental health on would be a wake up call.

I'm sorry to hear you're struggling @_PixieSolstice_

Nice to meet you, though.

Are you in a hospital or more of a recovery centre?

OH hun @_PixieSolstice_

That's tough. Are you in for two weeks?

I'm glad you are giving it a go. It took about 5-6 admissions for me.

It's very very hard the first time.

Talk to your key worker/clinician. That's what they are there for.

It'll take about 3 days to get used to things. Then re-assess.

Please take care. You are in a good place.

its a recovery centre @Birdofparadise8 - somewhat on the hospital grounds (to the point of I can connect to the state health systems free wifi lol) but away from the hospital too, to make it feel less hospitally

and yep @tyme it’s two weeks. I had a good chat to both the staff on this evening (after my lil cry) and that was nice, and they said similar to what you’ve just said - it’s my first time here and it’ll be a bit rough for a few days.

just gotta get through this

Is it like a PARC @_PixieSolstice_?

I was inpatient recently and it does take a few days to get used to it. I hope the next two weeks go okay and the crying eases for you. I know how hard it can be, but I'm sure you're strong and capable.

I just googled what that is @Birdofparadise8 and it’s that! We call it step up step down here

Is it a bit different than an inpatient stay at a hospital. I bet it doesn't have all the rules. I got sick of them being in for three and a bit weeks.

How are you feeling this morning @_PixieSolstice_?

Hey @tyme @Blackbird11

Are either of you around?

Yeah @Birdofparadise8 it’s much more relaxed than an inpatient stay. They have a rule that you aren’t allowed leave for the first 72 hours so I’m the only one out of the six of us that are staying ALL weekend here, everyone else is seeing their families etc at one point. (does this mean I might be allowed leave on Sunday afternoon? Who knows!)

Four of us and staff went for a group “outing” to one of the forest/nature kind of areas, where there’s an amazing view of the city, a nice place to walk around, and a cafe.
not the greatest today but eh. I feel safe enough not to mask my emotions and act like I’m fine, so this is huge for me

That's good then @_PixieSolstice_

Oh, really, I was allowed to leave the next day for a walk on my own. I got two hours of leave.

Still lovely, you get to go out all together for a walk and to the cafe.