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Not sure if this is the right place

StatueBobNew Contributor24 Oct 2022, 11:44 pm AEDT

Not sure if this is the right place

But, I will give it a go anyway.

For one reason or another, I was prescribed medication that is "antidepressant of the selective serotonin reuptake inhibitor class. It is used to treat major depressive disorder, obsessive–compulsive disorder, bulimia nervosa, panic disorder, and premenstrual dysphoric disorder."

I don't remember the events that lead to this prescription, although I have a general idea of when this happened and probably the why too. For a period of time, I was in an environment where I was under the leadership of a corporate bully who tore me apart, molecule by molecule. I remember planning suicide, in-depth and in a manner where I would be difficult to discover (no embarrassment to my family by my actions). I also remember seeing a counsellor, although that was a tainted experience as she was only comfortable and believed that we were making progress when I answered questions to the way she wanted.

Time has passed, a hell of a lot of time. Over the years I have doubled the dosage, halved it back down again, doubled it, and halved it. Every time in consultation was a doctor. The last time was about a year ago, again I got myself into a job where I had a triggersome manager who touched on the bullying side of things.

I've been diagnosed with stress, (maybe) depression, PTSD. The reason I say maybe is that my medical records were in a building that was destroyed and a lot of the paper documents were lost. I've experienced two situations whereby I believe that PTSD could've been caused, the first is military combat and the second is as a responder in a major natural event.

However I am now a lot older, perhaps even wiser as I have noticed that there are a number of ailments that I suffer from that I believe are linked to the side effects of the drug I take. I've spoken to doctors I've been made to feel like a hypochondriac so many times, that I am getting to the point where I don't even want to speak to a doctor anymore. And the only reason I feel this is because of a newspaper article that I read about someone in a similar situation.

Perhaps I have rattled on beyond a welcome and this is me scenario. 🙂

Perhaps, I will put this into a posting and see what you all think.

Take care

3 replies

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In response to: Not sure if this is the right place

NatureLoverSenior Contributor25 Oct 2022, 6:41 am AEDT

Re: Not sure if this is the right place

Hi, welcome, @StatueBob

I'm sorry to read about your bullying, PTSD and being made to feel like a hypochondriac at the doctors'.

I think it is a good introductory post, so we can start to get to know you. 🙂

A handy forum tip is if you type @ and then click on a name in the drop-down box, that person will get a notification and won't miss your reply.

I hope you find the forums supportive...

In response to: Not sure if this is the right place

Hopeful101Contributor25 Oct 2022, 8:21 am AEDT

Re: Not sure if this is the right place

Hi @StatueBob , welcome to the forum and thank you for sharing what you are going through and and previous experiences.

Given your prior employments and also being bullied by your bosses, PTSD is a common experience.

Have you looked up your current medication and its noted side effects? Also, through stress/PTSD, which wears down stress tolerance, physical ailments can arise.

I have C-PSTD, and have down trauma-informed therapy, which I recommend if you have not. Also, I would ask the doctors that are not treating you properly or professional if they are trauma-informed.

When I was properly diagnosed five years ago with C-PTSD, I was recommended to read The Body Keeps Score: Brain Mind and Body in the Healing Of Trauma. In that book, it says that stress can rear it head physically. There is a lot of supporting research around too.

For me, I develop cold sores or my lymph nodes flair up.

I hope you your situation improves and you get better support/treatment.

In response to: Not sure if this is the right place

FloatingFeatherSenior Contributor25 Oct 2022, 10:34 am AEDT

Re: Not sure if this is the right place

Hi @StatueBob,

Welcome to the Forums. My name is FloatingFeather and I am one of the peer support workers at SANE. Thank you for sharing your story with us - I know that it isn't always easy, particularly when you first start out.

It sounds like you have gone through some pretty tough times over the years. I would imagine your time in military combat plus being a responder in a major natural event may have taken a toll on you. I often wonder how people get on that work as first responders in really tough situations. I wonder how they are after the event has past and the dust settles. I would hope that you are always provided with professional support for an extended period of time after an event.

As I get older I've started to listen to my inner voice more; my gut instinct. You know yourself better than anyone - if you really believe that you are suffering ailments due to side effects of the drugs you take I think you have the right to question this and not be made to feel like you are a hypochondriac. I'm sorry that you were made to feel this way. I understand that you may be tired of looking for doctors that will listen to you and believe you but I really hope you do find one that will believe you and support you soon.

Take care of yourself and keep posting - it's lovely to have you here.

Warm regards,

FloatingFeather

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