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Escalating odd experiences

AdelheidCasual Contributor21 Aug 2022, 9:32 pm AEST

Escalating odd experiences

Hi all,

Lately I've been getting these weird, I guess episodes? I've had them to some extent for a really long time but it's getting worse. I don't really know what to make of it so thought I'd post here to see if this resonates with anyone.

It starts with the world around me feeling unfamiliar and "unreal" or fake somehow. I get feelings of sounds being too loud/soft, colours being too intense/muted, objects looking larger/smaller than they should. This part is all pretty familiar by this point.

If it keeps going from there it turns to a persistent deja-vu type feeling. It feels like I've done everything before, everything happening around me feels scripted in some way. I'll often notice movement in things that aren't moving, like a subtle ripple in the rocks around the train tracks.

The feeling that everything around me is pre-scripted gets more intense and I start feeling like the end result of the script is that something bad is going to happen to me. Random occurrences and observations start to feel significant and connected to each other in a way I can't really describe?

It feels like there's this common mechanism tying everything together, and that by recognising that, finding the links between these things and "decoding" the messages from seemingly random signs I can read the script and use that to change whatever outcome I'm headed towards.

When it gets really bad it feels like everyone around me knows that I can see it and are keeping tabs on me.

Even while it's happening I'm completely aware that the thoughts are absurd and have no basis in reality but they are still there and *feel* real. I just try and ignore it and distract myself but I have to admit to being a little freaked out!

Thank you for reading if you got this far! Has anyone had experience with anything similar? I'm not really sure what I should be doing about it if anything.

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In response to: Escalating odd experiences

AdelheidCasual Contributor23 Aug 2022, 11:44 am AEST

Re: Escalating odd experiences

Hi @Former-Member!

Honestly, posting here and talking to my partner helped me process things enough that I realised that I was spiraling a little. Getting out of my own head helps.

I'm not sure if this is going to make sense, but there's a part of me that feels detached from what's going on and rational at all times. If I think that I'm spiraling on something I can kind of 'check in' with it and ground myself with that perspective. I do the same thing to ground myself through the episodes I've been experiencing.

When I first starting posting here, it was because I was generally freaking out. I think now I'm mostly just looking to connect with similar experiences so that I feel less isolated, and hopefully make others feel less isolated as well.

I've got the mental health triage line saved in my phone, and my partner has the same. There's a walk-in emergency clinic near my house, and another in the CBD which is 24/7. I've put together a plan of "here's what to do if I'm feeling unsafe" with escalating options depending on how much immediate support I think I need. I would be happy to share if anyone else would find that useful 🙂

In response to: Re: Escalating odd experiences

Unknown userMember23 Aug 2022, 5:36 pm AEST

Re: Escalating odd experiences

Heya @Chickenmancer and @Adelheid!

@Chickenmancer thank you so much for sharing your experiences! I reckon those resources would be so useful for the forum to see, if you're up for sharing!

@Adelheid, I'm so glad you've found connecting with others really helpful and that you want to help others feel less isolated too. I know there are a lot of forumites who have had similar experiences. I'll share an image below for how to find other, similar posts.

And yep, it totally makes sense that you're kinda feeling detached from what's going on. And being able to ground yourself is useful. Is there something you do when you "check in" that has worked?

And they sounds like super practical things if you're ever unsafe. Especially if they're shared with your partner. And again, if you're comfy sharing, I'm sure others would find it super valuable.

Aaannnndddd most posts in the forums are tagged so members can search easily. If you click on the lived experience part of the forum and scroll to the bottom, you should see something like this. Hopefully that helps!

Keep us updated ❤️

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