Convincing someone to get help

Thanks Madison I can feel you may have been in a similar situation too. I will certainly get that book.

It is hard to let go, as I know how far he may fall. Helps never really there I took him to PA (bris) twice so did ambulance and police he just gets turned away. Terrible feeling of hopelessness in those situations.

Yes, I understand what you are saying @Milicent Letting go is difficult & sometimes it might not be the right thing. It is a complicated balance. We are put in impossible situations, where sometimes we have to make decisions about another person's life & I have felt totally out of my depth when these situations occur. I don't know if their is a right or wrong course of action.

To see him fall might be unbearable & damaging. There is also the idea that sometimes people need to hit rock bottom before they change. I don't know where your son is at. Maybe you have an instinct on what to do?

Being turned away from medical support is devastating.

You are doing great by reaching out here. Tiny positive steps each day is something! I have become anxious, stressed & my sleep affected in the past. It is important to be gentle & kind with myself.

'YOU DIDN'T CAUSE IT, YOU CAN'T CONTROL IT, AND YOU CANNOT CURE IT.'

Hi all,

J̌ust thought I'd look at my original post. It's now over 2 years later and the only thing that has changed is its worse. We are no longer in contact with our son. How do you help someone who is in total denial about his drinking and illnesses. He is alone, basically friendless and has no funds at all. As far as I know he has not done anything about his health, is not on meds or seeing anyone. Really it's a complete disaster for him. If only to those idiots at PA took us seriously when I convinced him to go, twice in a period of a year I think. They just did nothing, we got a brochure and a lie. He never got help or a team, nothing. Didn't even speak to anyone to assess him. Talk about negligent, I'm still fuming years later. I don't know why I'm here now I know it's completely useless if you can't get help when you ask and now it's too late. All this money gets pumped into stuff and really its useless if they don't help them.

Hi @Milicent I can only imagine how frustrated and let down you would be feeling after getting your son to accept this help, only for him to not receive the care that was needed. That must've been heartbreaking.

Have you been able to submit a complaint to this service about this? I know that sometimes it can seem hopeless but at the very least voicing these serious concerns about negligence might offer some small relief.

With everything you've been through have you been able to receive any support yourself?

I wish that there was more (or really anything) that I could say to make this situation better for you, but I want to let you know I'm here with you.

Thank you for your reply I do appreciate it. I'm sure you're all too aware of these frustrations, I'm also sure I'm not the only one.

My sister has had Schizophrenia all her life and it is only now she is much better, on the depot injection. (About 3 years now is 67) She doesn't think so of course but outwardly a world of difference, stable accommodation and carers, so I know people can get help if they get the right people on board. So is frustrating to know our son is about 6 more years down the illness track due to incompetence.probably irreversible now, sorry I'm just fed up. Noone cares for the men. I understand they can be difficult but the right people know what to do and say.

I've sent a complaint as I was worried they'd check on him unexpectedly and he'd hate me even more. Sorry again

No need to apologize at all @Milicent if talking about this here is even a little bit helpful then we are more than happy to listen and sit with you.

I understand not wanting to make a complaint for fear of it impacting your relationship with your son even more, that's naturally your first priority in that situation.

I'm glad to hear that your sister was able to find the right support for her, and really hope that your son is able to find this too