I can’t cope

 Thanks! @tyme My image is priceless.

They will never change and don’t want change.

A break will be good. Even though I’m in a bad place, I know that I am different and I need to work harder to be better.

I’ve got a lot I’m expecting out of this admission. I had a dream about it last night. It was like a dorm room with 3 others. They wouldn’t talk to me, wouldn’t let me use the fridge and locked me out of the room. I guess I’m terrified about it.

It's not that bad lol @Captain24 . You'll most likely have your own room, maybe with a desk. Then you have common areas like the loungeroom so you can watch TV. Maybe a few bean bags around...

Can you look it up on the internet and see if there are any photos?

I have looked @tyme. It has a bed, not a hospital bed and an ensuite. Not sure about anything else. You’re not allowed to have another woman in your room. I park my car on the street and they take me keys and I don’t get them back until discharge. I know there is group therapy of a morning that are compulsory and creative sorts things in the afternoon. There is also a gym and a hydrotherapy pool.

Nice @Captain24 . That sounds about right.

Yes, you can't have other people in your room. You can only be with others in common areas.

I'm actually excited for you.

I’m scared shit less @tyme. Question. Why are you excited for me?

Hey @Captain24

One more sleep and you’ll have your own space again yeah? I’m sorry that this break hasn’t been a nice break.

from my experience, I had my own room with ensuite. It had a single bed, bedside table, desk with TV and a cupboard.
They had a large dining room (people hung out in here) with a fancy coffee machine, endless supply of fruit and biscuits and a small fridge for patients to put things in.
there were so many options at meal times and always dessert lunch and dinner. No wonder I put weight on!
there wasn’t a lounge room, you had a one seater lounge in your room and people just hung out in the dining room. There was an outside courtyard too and a designated smokers area. And there was a laundry.

can you google the facility you are going to? Maybe they have photos of rooms etc?

I will be glad to have my own space again. @Bow

Thanks for the info. I have googled it and not much has come up, plus I’ve read the info sheet but it doesn’t tell me much basic stuff.

I do know that groups also involve yoga and walking in the forest behind the centre. So mum now thinks it’s a health and wellness centre.

They know about my ED so I’m concerned that they will be watching me. I can’t afford any more weight gain.

You are perhaps on your way home @Captain24 or already home?

if they know about your ED, what kind of support would you like from them? I think it could be a good opportunity to get a little support and get yourself into some kind of healthy food routine perhaps?

Yay!! I’m finally home. I have never wanted to come home so badly from holidays before. I’m sitting on the lounge on my own. No one fighting. No one yelling at my dogs. No one telling me what to do. It’s great!

I do know though that being alone does come with its own issues. But I don’t care anymore whatever happens, happens.

Im not sure I want their support with it @Bow. I know that sounds wrong. I don’t think I’m ready for change. But I guess I have to take the opportunity. I’m more concerned with my state of mind. But a healthy eating plan that I’m ok with may work.

I took a photo for you @Jynx hope you had a good birthday.

Aww haha they're soooo cute @Captain24!!! Lil puppers in a pram, how delightful!

Glad that home feels like a relief for you hun 💜