I can’t cope

Thanks @tyme

I just made a hot chocolate.

It’s so hard. It’s heartbreaking because I thought I was on the way up. Saturday was a fantastic day. I hope it’s just a massive bump and I don’t have to start all over again. I don’t know if I have the strength to start again.

I have that sick feeling in the pit of my stomach again. It’s just a vicious cycle that I don’t want to be a part of. I just want it to stop. I hate it. I feel useless and worthless. I wasn’t feeling like this.

My Covid must be on my medical file as the MH nurse rang me today and new about it. She is ringing me again tomorrow but I guess there isn’t much she can do.

I just need to get it all out.

Is the MH service 24 hours? If things get worse, are you able to phone them tonight? @Captain24

I hope the hot choc will be somewhat soothing at this difficult time.

Hugs, tyme

Yes @tyme they have a number that I can call out of hours. I am scared to call them but if I get to the point where I feel unsafe I will.

The hot chocolate is good. I’ll go and have a shower and go to bed.

Thanks for your support tonight. I really appreciate it. Especially since I’ve been difficult. I am sorry.

Hey @Captain24 ,

Don't be sorry. As much as I cringe at the saying 'We're all in this together' - I honestly believe the essence of the message is here tonight.

You are not alone. This certainly IS a bump in the road. I hear you feel worthless, yet we know for a fact that you are definitely NOT useless.

We very much value your companionship here. You bring so much to the forums 🙂

I want to re-iterate that the crisis lines are available for you.

• Lifeline on 13 11 14
• beyondblue on 1300 224 636
• Suicide Call Back Service on 1300 659 467

I look forward to hearing from you tomorrow. I hope the hot choc helped! I'm only just having dinner now. I'm having cous cous with some spicy chickpea something-a-rather....

Tada,

tyme

Still feeling really low today. The MH nurse has authorised me to get out 3 times a day for a walk. I have to wear a mask and distance myself but my estate is pretty quiet during the day other than builders so it shouldn’t be too hard.

I'm sorry to hear about the low mood @Captain24 but that's great news about being able to get out. I hope that will help 💝

It did a little @Paperdaisy. I’ll go again this afternoon. Today is one of those days where I feel like I’ll be stuck in the space forever

Afternoon @Captain24 im so sorry that your still feeling so low. When are you out of isolation? Glad that you have been given permission to get out of the house every day, I hope that does something to lift your mood, even just a little.
💕

I get out of isolation on Sunday @Bow.

Ill take the dogs for a walk soon so hopefully I’ll come back feeling a bit better.
Ive also spent sometime in the backyard in the sun so that feels good.

Thanks for checking in

The weather is beautiful here today.

Just had a brisk walk with the dog and actually feel a tiny bit better. I guess I have to try and hold onto that tiny bit.