I can’t cope

You’ve gotten through another day @Captain24 thats great. I hope that you can get off to sleep quickly and that you wake tomorrow feeling a bit better

Just stopping by to see how you are doing this morning @Captain24 what are your work shifts like this week?

Thanks for stopping by my @Bow. I still feel really defeated and I’m not in a good way at all. But I have an appointment with my CM today. I think she was suppose to be out of town but she is staying for me. She is also getting in contact with the psychiatrist to work out how to help.

I have to work tomorrow and Thursday day shifts then Friday Saturday Sunday nightshifts. This is going to be hard to get through.

I hope you are feeling a little better today. You deserve to be you are a good and caring person.

Hi @Captain24

I'm wondering how you went with your CM?

❤️

It was tough @hanami. It went for 1 1\2 hrs. She did a lot of talking about trying to reframe my thoughts. Telling me I’m not a failure it’s my illness. So told me that I show strength for turning up to each appointment.

The last question she asked was do I feel safe within myself and I said no but I wouldn’t act on it. I told her I feel like I have lost the battle. Ive lost myself right now. I told her how broken I am and that I don’t want to do it anymore.

This is probably the worst Ive been since I reached out for help. She is trying to get a psychiatrist appointment but it won’t be for a few weeks. She is even making sure she is in town when I need her instead of doing her other job.

I think it's really kind of her to stay around so she is there for you. She really cares a lot.

Sitting with you and sending hope and warm wishes

Hanami ❤️

I’ve done what I was told not to do. I just had a nap.

I just can’t face life feeling like this. It hasn’t helped at all. I feel so broken. My heart is broken, my spirit is broken and I’m broken.

@Captain24 💕💕

My CM is trying to organise an emergency psychiatrist appointment ASAP. I guess that means I’m really not ok. I feel sick. I can’t eat. I can’t do anything but lay in the lounge. I don’t even want to face work tomorrow. I can’t keep going on like this.

Im sorry I keep posting but I don’t know what else to do. I’ve got nowhere else to turn. My team are doing what they can.

Hey @Captain24 I really hear that you are struggling a lot right now, and honestly am very glad that you are posting about it - please continue to do so as much as needed. It sounds really scary to need an emergency appt but it does sound like they're doing their best to look after you.

We will be with you along the way too. What do you think you need right now? Perhaps it is just a matter of passing some time until you hear from your CM?