I can’t cope

I am too. @MissGremlin. Being on here has helped me a lot.

Sorry it was a rough night. I’m hoping today is a little easier for you. We just have to focus on knowing we are here for each other when we can’t see it.

Can you do your shopping at that time? Will it help pass the time a little?

@Captain24 yes that's what we have to try to focus on.

I don't have any shopping to do today.

It’s starting to @AuntGlow. I’m really slowly getting there. I’m seeing that I am doing the best that I can in a terrible situation. Well trying to anyway. This has only come from my support network helping me try and see the changes.

No she didn’t actually, I decided it myself. I still feel the need to accomplish something. Not just general cleaning. If that’s all I do it’s not good enough and isn’t sorting out the house. So it’s for me to feel as though I have achieved something on my break and to start getting the other rooms in order instead of beating myself up and pushing myself to get everything done at once. It’s me trying a different approach.

Yeah, now that I have to padlock I feel safer. It’s still very concerning though and I still feel uneasy.

At the moment we are working together. She is helping me with the dog food and stuff and I’m giving her some too. It feels like a 2 way street. She has been really good since I nearly lost Pix and has been so helpful with the diabetes having been through it with one of her other dogs. As I’m working so hard on myself I’m feeling less resentment to her. There is still the cPTSD that she has cause and all of this has stemmed from her but I can’t change that now. I can’t use my present until my birthday though when I get the soda stream to go with it! 😂

We always try to do things that are special for Mother’s Day and birthdays. I’m trying to find a better connection with her.

What can you do to keep busy during that time? @MissGremlin Lets brainstorm some ideas. I’ll be cleaning and washing my hair.

@Captain24 maybe my diamond art, I'll probably also have the TV on with a movie playing then too.

That sounds good @MissGremlin. If you’re up for it what about a walk with Casper. I totally get if you can’t though. I haven’t walked my dogs in a long time but I also have serious snake problems out here.

@Captain24 getting out feels like too much today. I've already had to go out and talk to someone, that took everything out of me but Casper loved getting pats. Still have to go out later in the afternoon too. Definitely don't want to risk walking the dogs when there's snakes around.

Sorry. I had some trouble logging in @MissGremlin

How are you?

@Captain24 oh that sucks, glad you've been able to log back in now.

I really crashed it today, yesterday took so much out of me. I'm currently sitting in my car waiting.

How's your day been?

I’ve completed my entire list @MissGremlin. I’ve had my psych appointment and I am so drained and exhausted. I’m thinking I may go and lay down for a little while. I’m all shaky and can barely stand up let alone function.