I can’t cope

@Captain24 haha i miss dots all the time 😂.

I get that, they all have different looks and personalities.

Thankyou sweet, I'm glad you're here. I have to get up soon to do some things then maybe after I'll try to do some diamond art.

Motivation is hard, but you've got this sweet. I'm glad you're enjoying it, it makes me happy to hear that.

Maybe it is a good sign, try to treasure the moments when things feel ok.

Maybe when you have done those things we can sit and do some diamond art together @MissGremlin

When I say enjoying it, I’m not jumping up and down excited just calm and relaxed doing it. It’s quite nice. The thoughts are all still there just a little quieter at the moment. It all just seems a little less rough right now. I really do need some sleep though. It’s something that I can remember and know that it can be a little quieter and a little easier. I have to focus on these moments

How are you feeling in your tummy today?

@Captain24 that would be good and I'd really love to, but I'm not sure when I'll be finished and I know you'll be going out later.

I know what you mean. But the fact that you're feeling calm and relaxed while doing it is such a huge step forward even with those thoughts still being there. I'm so glad that things are not feeling as rough right now, definitely enjoy the time and know that these moments can happen more often.

My tummy is feeling fine today thankfully.

I sort of think life it not just about doing things for myself, but to do things for others, even if it is sacrificing part of my own desires @Captain24 . As long as it's a balance and I'm not going fully one way or the other.

If I only do things for myself, then I become selfish. If I only do things for others, then I'm burnt out.

I found a property I might get. When I told my niece, she was so upset. She said, "Who's going to cook for you!? When you get sick and get diabetes, don't expect me to look after you!" She was angry lol.

In my head though, I'm thinking of getting the property now, renting it out and then later renovate it before I live in it.

As I said, I want to move away from my sister's place once the kids are older. I don't like the place I'm in now because there are stairs. I told you I fell down the stairs late last year, right? Since then, I'm looking for a single storey place.

What are you up to today? Mothers' day stuff?

I went and got my pillow and some fuel @MissGremlin. Now I’m home until I go to mums at 6

It’s ok, whenever you are ready.

Im glad your tummy is better today. Do you have much to do?

That’s a good way to look at it @tyme. The balance. I like that.

Is the place close by? Or somewhere else? That’s funny that she is angry. Where did the diabetes thing come from? I love that she isn’t looking after you. 😂. Getting it ready sounds good renting and renovating then it’s ready to go when you need to. I know you don’t want to be there forever. Get the no stairs, I’d fall up and down them all the time! I trip on the truck stairs at least once a day! You fell just before you went to India didn’t you?

I’ve just been out and brought myself another pillow and got some fuel. Other than that all I’ve been doing is diamond art. I finished the one for mums birthday so now I’ve started on another one. I’ve also been looking through photos and have found some more that I want to order. 2 more dogs and I want to try a beach photo and see how it goes. Other than that I’ll be at mums at 6 for dinner. Mum posted a photo of Jett and Pix on Facebook wishing me a happy fur-mummies day!

Do you ring your mum? What are your plans for today?

Glad you are going to your mum's a 6. Nah, I haven't called my mum. I might send a text later if I remember @Captain24

Yes, I fell down the stairs just before going to India... it was the worst... so since then, I've had to be so careful.

But while I can get another property, I may as well. It's not far far, but more than just 'next door' which means have more peace lol.

I laughed when my niece said, "diabetes". I was thinking, "Where did that come from?"

But yes, I showed her to house (from the outside today). It's three bedrooms, so she's taken a room already lol.

I didn't tell her than I'm not going to live in it any time soon.

I don't have any plans for today except for maybe taking the kids out later tonight. @Captain24

I hope the diamond art goes well for you! Round or sqare dots?

You’re hopeless! @tyme 😂 I mean that in a joking way!

I can imagine, is it only your room upstairs or more?

If you can do it now it makes sense, you never know what is around the corner. Maybe you won’t be able to get one at the time. Don’t be so mean and tell her! Poor thing will be stressing that she has to sleep in her own bed! 😜

You being around now does that mean you aren’t on tonight?

Of course they are square dots! The next ones I order will be too. They have to match when they are all framed and hung. The scenery ones that I’m looking at are different to the ones I’ve done as they are all mostly animals and these ones will be coastal. I don’t have anywhere to hang them right now anyway.

Have you ever done square?

Nah, I have 3 rooms upstairs, a kitchen, bathroom, toilet and lounge area upstairs @Captain24 So I sort of HAVE to go upstairs. I use the upstairs more than the downstairs. I come home, go upstairs and that's the end. I only go downstairs if I'm going next door to my sister's to look after the kids or get food lol

Hahahhaa. My BIL will help me get the pre-approval. The house is for auction, so I may not even get it! The auction is towards the end of this month. But first, I actualy need to go see this house. Sometimes the pics look good, but when you go there, it's a different feel altogether. Just like there is another house on sale next to me now. I thought it looked really good, but when I went to go see it, I didn't like it at all. I feel claustrophobic in there. @Captain24 (and also, it's too accessible to the kids now!)

If I do the house, then I'll tell her.

And no, I'm not going to be around tonight. I'm only here for a short time, then I'm off. Hours have changed which I'm still getting used to. That's okay. At least I can still be around 🙂

And square dots! I barely have patience for round dots, let alone needing the perfection of square ones! I told you I still have the lion one to complete. It's right next to me, and I havent' touched it maybe in two years. It's just gathering dust.

I can't wait to see the diamond art once you finish. Coastal is always nice.

Oh.. that means you have to climb the stairs daily! Yuck @tyme

Im glad he will help. If you are meant to get it you will, if you don’t get it then it’s not meant to be. That’s how I see things anyway. Yeah, see what it actually looks like first. Definitely not the house next door!!!

At least you are still here. That’s what matters. The first one I ever did was squares and I didn’t order it. I have only done the round ones in hospital, they are easier but I like everything matching! I was like that with the Pix and Angel picture but once I started it I haven’t stopped. One of the ones I’m ordering is mums dog before Angel. She will have no idea and I’m going to do it for Christmas so I will have to keep it covered for when they come in. She will love it and totally not expect it. I’m going to do one of my dog before Pix as well. But I can’t do that till after Christmas as mum will guess.

This is the one I finished today

This is a photo of the one I’ve just started