I can’t cope

@Captain24 i hear you on your fear with the Pdoc appointment, is she in communication with your other supports sweet? Sometimes there's that possibility of communication between them so that they can have a better understanding of you and your situation.

Hope the boss does listen and puts you where you ask to go. You're doing so well to manage everything sweet and picking up extra work to help with the cost of things is no small task.

Take today one small step at a time sweetheart, if you want when you have a small break you are welcome to tag me and we can connect for a bit before you do the next thing on your list. You've got this though, I know you do cos you're amazing and strong ❤️

I just emailed my psych to let her know that I have the appointment if she wanted to add anything. @MissGremlin. I’m sure she will but my GP sent enough anyway. I read his letter.

It’s hard as I’m having enough trouble getting to work as it is without being on another crew. I do know some of them though. I’m pretty anxious about it. I’m hoping some of my crew are doing overtime too.

Im still in the lounge, I’m going to go and get dressed and head into town. I only need a few things so hopefully it’s cheap and quick.

Do you need help with anything? I can be your accountability buddy too. If you want

@Captain24 that's great that you've emailed your psych and I'm glad that your gp has sent enough through in his letter. It sounds like your supports are really helpful at the moment and making sure you can get the help you need and deserve.

I can understand the anxiety sweet, I'm really hoping it all goes ok and that some of your crew are there aswell.

You can do this sweet, one step at a time, first getting dressed and then heading into town to get the things you need.

Thankyou sweet, don't worry about me though. I'm just using my time to help others while I can.

I got dressed and did the shopping. Now I’m cooking the schnitzels to make lunches for the next 2 day shifts plus I have dinners sorted.

I’m about to feed the dogs and then I need to start on the house. @MissGremlin

Please let me help you. I really worry about you. I really do care and I’m concerned. I’ve been thinking of you and the really hard time you are going through so I am trying to make my posts lighter than my head is. I know I have supports and a safe place to live and you don’t have any of that and I feel bad that I have those and you don’t. So I really want to help as much as I can from over here.

@Captain24 you've done so well to get dressed and get the shopping done, I'm really proud of you sweet. Schnitzels for lunches sounds delicious and well done for having dinners sorted.

Hope Pix and Jett enjoy their food. Take the house one little bit at a time sweet and I'm here if you want to chat at anytime ☺️.

Please don't feel bad sweetheart, I'm so glad that you have good supports and a safe place to live. You are welcome to share exactly how you are feeling and what's going on in your head, this is your safe space and I'm here for you ❤️.

I have made my meals up for the next few days. I have fed the dogs and now I’m boiling the eggs for breakfasts. @MissGremlin. I haven’t touched the house work yet. But it’s pretty clean so it shouldn’t take long. Then I’ll be ready and everything done. I have no washing or ironing left to do and the dishwasher is doing its thing.

Trying to talk myself into finishing everything.

Im thinking maybe I should try diamond art when I’m done. Just not sure about it.

What are you up to?

@Captain24 well done sweet, you are doing so incredibly well. Sounds like the house only needs a quick clean for it to be done which means that you've done an amazing job keeping on top of things.

Doing some diamond art after is a good idea I think but it all depends on how it feels for you.

I haven't done anything. I'm still laying in bed. I have dishes to do and washing to do and fold but right now I just don't see a point.

I have finished cleaning the house. I even moved the chairs and stools and cleaned under them. I have 22 minutes until the dishwasher is finished and I’ve done an hour and a half of diamond art. I didn’t enjoy it but I don’t enjoy anything, I didn’t hate it though. I had to stop as my neck and back were starting to get sore from being hunched over. I have to think of work for the next 5 days.

Those things can wait @MissGremlin. It doesn’t matter if they aren’t done. Resting in bed is sometimes what is needed.

@Captain24 I'm so proud of you sweet, you've done amazing today. I understand doing the diamond art and not enjoying it but the fact that you did some is an achievement in itself. Can relate to getting sore from being hunched over too.

I really wish I could go to bed right now.