I can’t cope

Actually I was told I could ask for it @tyme as long as I did it with respect which I believe I have. It took a lot for me to write it as I did it in fear.

I know it’s life but I try to keep myself as safe as possible in the real world as well. I avoid people as much as possible. I’m not a nice person and this just shows it.

You both deserve to be heard @ArraDreaming @Captain24 .

I recognise that @ArraDreaming is doing what they can to reach out and connect in a safe way. Yet I also acknowledge that it may take time for @Captain24 reach the point of feeling safe enough to connect.

You both have your own stories of recovery, survival and strength and we know how much you are both trying to better yourselves.

We are here to support, but if any time you feel it is too much, you are encouraged to have a bit of a break if you feel it will help.

We'd love to get to a point where we can all connect with each other safely. You don't have to get along like a house on fire, but any connection involves some boundaries.

We are here to guide you.

Thank you @Captain24 @ArraDreaming for both being open.

Sorry @tyme. I was just trying to look after myself but it doesn’t matter. My wellbeing comes first for me but it seems to be a problem. Sorry.

Hey @Captain24

I don't see it as a problem, but I'm sorry if you do. If would be sad to see you not connect because of this.

We're here for you, just like we're here for others.

I really hear you on the sleeping because you have nothing to give front - it can be a heavy feeling, but it will shift. 💛

Maybe you're allowed to just be and not have to do much right now?

In saying this, what would you like to do right now, if you could? @Captain24

It’s hard @tyme. I’m scared on here. You know how bad I have been and how much trouble I have caused and been in.

Im just really overwhelmed with everything. Once again I’m crying.

Im really sorry.

Honestly I don’t know @AuntGlow. I have no idea what I would like to do. I really just have nothing.

please delete if I have said to much. I don’t want to get into more trouble. It’s the most I’ve said about how I feel and I’m scared

I appreciate you sharing this with me. I am so sorry that you are feeling scared, we always want you to feel safe here, please know that. @Captain24

What might help with this sense of safety right now? Would dropping anchor together help at all? 💛

I ruined that safety feeling the other weekend @AuntGlow. It’s my own fault. I’m trying really hard but I don’t feel like this is a safe space again yet. I guess it’ll come but it’ll take me a long time. I just know I’ll get banned and that is rejection and we know I don’t cope with that very well.

I’ve just had a shower and I can’t separate my thoughts or

my feelings. It’s just a jumbled mess. I even tried to picture the beach and it just doesn’t do it for me either and that’s my happy place.