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Something’s not right

I can’t cope

Captain24Senior Contributor16 June 2022, 9:48 pm AEST

I can’t cope

Hi. I’m new and have never been in anything like this before.
I’m really struggling with depression at the moment and just need a place to vent.
there is no reason as to why I feel this way. I just hate myself and feel like I’m an unworthy and useless person. I don’t have a partner or many friends. I feel like I keep pushing them away when I’m down. I’m just not worthy of them. I hate life and just wish I would go to sleep and not wake up. I feel so much emotional pain inside but numb at the same time. None of this makes any sense but it just how I feel.

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In response to: I can’t cope

PaperdaisySenior Contributor07 Nov 2022, 6:24 pm AEDT

Re: I can’t cope

Hey @Captain24 Here if you need anything 💝

In response to: Re: I can’t cope

Captain24Senior Contributor07 Nov 2022, 6:43 pm AEDT

Re: I can’t cope

Thanks @Paperdaisy. I’m just far from ok today.

In response to: Re: I can’t cope

PaperdaisySenior Contributor07 Nov 2022, 6:49 pm AEDT

Re: I can’t cope

I hear that you're not OK right now @Captain24 Have you done anything to support yourself?

In response to: Re: I can’t cope

Captain24Senior Contributor07 Nov 2022, 7:20 pm AEDT

Re: I can’t cope

Other than sit with Pixie, no @Paperdaisy. I feel defeated. I feel like there is no point anymore

In response to: Re: I can’t cope

PaperdaisySenior Contributor07 Nov 2022, 7:28 pm AEDT

Re: I can’t cope

Hey @Captain24 It can sometimes feel like that but then something will happen that will lift you up again. From my experience, therapy is exhausting. I think sometimes there is an expectation that it's going to make everything better straight away but the truth is we have to do a lot of work and it's called "work" because it's hard!! I'm still a work in progress. I'm sorry you're feeling so defeated. I'm sitting with you 🤗

In response to: Re: I can’t cope

Captain24Senior Contributor07 Nov 2022, 8:13 pm AEDT

Re: I can’t cope

It’s only just started to get a little more intense @Paperdaisy. I’m really not dealing with it well. I don’t really understand my reaction to it and why I react so badly. It makes me feel more like a complete failure.

In response to: Re: I can’t cope

PaperdaisySenior Contributor07 Nov 2022, 8:34 pm AEDT

Re: I can’t cope

Have you communicated that to them @Captain24 ? Would it be worth sending an email with your after thoughts and reactions?

In response to: Re: I can’t cope

Captain24Senior Contributor07 Nov 2022, 8:55 pm AEDT

Re: I can’t cope

I have a session with my MH nurse tomorrow @Paperdaisy . The session last week is what triggered me the most and I did email her the next day. She got the email and was away for the rest of the week that’s why we have an app tomorrow. The therapist today doesn’t do out of appointment contact.

Its probably my fault. Maybe it’s because I have deserved what has previously happened to me.

In response to: Re: I can’t cope

PaperdaisySenior Contributor07 Nov 2022, 8:59 pm AEDT

Re: I can’t cope

It's definitely not your fault @Captain24 and you didn't/don't deserve what happened. You deserve kindness. Please be kind to yourself.

In response to: Re: I can’t cope

Captain24Senior Contributor07 Nov 2022, 9:13 pm AEDT

Re: I can’t cope

It’s so hard to believe that I didn’t deserve it @Paperdaisy. I feel like I’m not and never have been a good enough daughter and that’s why I was and still am emotionally abused. At least as an adult most of the physical abuse has stopped. On top of that the SA was my fault.

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SANE acknowledges the Traditional Owners of Country throughout Australia and recognises the continuing connection to lands, waters and communities. We pay our respect to Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander cultures; and to Elders past and present.

SANE values diversity. We are committed to providing a safe, culturally appropriate, and inclusive service for all people, regardless of their ethnicity, faith, disability, sexuality, or gender identity.