I can’t cope

Hi @Captain24

The bush walk sounds really nice. I hope over the coming days you are able to do more. I'm sure the dogs will enjoy it too.

I'm sorry to hear about your mum and dad. It must be even harder to deal with when they are fighting and including you in it too. Hopefully they can keep a lid on it until Thursday for your sake.

A little snippet of todays walk.

@Captain24 soooo lush!! Is that 4th pic like a coastal cave or something? Hope you're going well this arvo 💜

Hey @Jynx. You’re in early today! Are you still on tonight or do you have the night off?

It’s a slot canyon. It’s a bush walk from one end of the bay to the other. It’s 27km long. I think I’ve nearly done half in 2 days.

There are more photos that I posted last night.

How was your weekend?

@Captain24 ya just for today a lil shift swappy! It's a little odd being around this early hahaha. But no night off tonight! Which will also spin me about I'm sure, I'm so used to my work day finishing at 10pm. I'm not gonna know what to do with myself!!

I did see your other pics just now! Ach, I can just imagine how much awe and wonder that would inspire to see it in person.

My weekend has been a bit of a rollercoaster, just sorting through some relationship stuff with a newly forming polycule in my life. It's uhhh... complicated but I have a lot of confidence in our capabilities, awareness of our own triggers, and in our resilience so I think we'll be ok! Buuuut I may have bought some coping lego haha loooook!!

I've wanted the succulents for ages, so excited to put it together!!

What's on for you this arvo?

Oh an early night! @Jynx

The walk has been amazing. Just one incident of a brown stick sliding into the bushes! I just hung back for a bit before I went past.

I’ll miss you tonight. I needed a vent session. My parents are being nasty.

I hope it turns out to be a good roller coaster. It must be hard forming that sort of relationship. I get that communication is paramount.

Defs a cool coping tool! Lego is good for any situation.

I’ve been stocking up on different things to try as my Lego and diamond art have become just a chore.

@Captain24 you're more than welcome to vent here n now? Or if you wanna just let it all out later tonight, I can respond tomorrow - whatever's clever!

Yeah communication is number one!! The forming of the relationships isn't too difficult, it's more the navigation of ensuring everyone's needs are being met. It's a whole extra person's worth of needs after all! Plus the eternal nightmare that is scheduling 😅 It's cool though I've been listening to the audiobook of Jessica Fern's book Polysecure. Honestly the book is SO GOOD at talking about attachment theory I'd recommend it to everyone, whether they're poly or not!

Oh good idea, I'm glad that you're listening to that part of you that feels like it's a chore! Found anything you're excited about?

I’ll vent later tonight and tag you @Jynx

Ive never thought too much into poly. But the logistics that need to happen is really eye opening. I’m interested to hear about it. Obviously it’s not for me as no relationship is.

I’ve got some wooden thing that you can make into flower pots, they were the cheap version, you can create working clocks and everything. I’ve got mosaic art to do and some polymer clay thing. I may have got another Lego set though.

The only problem this stuff that I’ve gotten I can’t get at home. I have to travel for it.

Yeah.. we were going to talk about it feeling like a chore but we haven’t gotten to it.

Oh you're right @Captain24 we haven't chatted about that yet! Did you wanna open that box up now? I'm here till 5 so we have a little time, but also if you're currently not too dysregulated and worry it might change that, we can save it for another day. Your choice hun 💜

Wow those sound so cool!! Hehe yay more lego, which set? Aww can't wait to see some of these new projects if you decide to share em!

Oh and re: polyamory @Captain24 this is more or less what resonates with me and has helped me embrace poly life: Tumblr post on Toxic Monogamy. Although it helped that like... about 8 years ago when I truly thought no one would ever love me, one of my (now bestest) friends hit on me at a house party and like, started courting me. I was at a point where any kind of indication of desire was like, hugely surprising so I was willing to do whatever in order to continue the relationship and well, he was poly, he had another partner, and he introduced me to the concept. So even though I'd grown up socialised to believe that there's only ONE WAY you're SUPPOSED to do relationships (which is complete and utter BS and so harmful to us as a society) I was willing to put my 'values' (i.e. blindly accepted socialisation) aside in order to continue the connection. A little while later I discovered Relationship Anarchy and haven't looked back. It legitimately has had a hugely positive impact on how I approach relationships and has been a big factor in my efforts to heal my attachment trauma.