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Elderly mother

NMDAUGHTERNew Contributor24 May 2022, 6:26 pm AEST

Elderly mother

Hi , new to this ,

Wow where to start my mother 87 years old lives with my sister.

I think my mother has dementia undiagnosed, sometimes she ring me and tell me the stranges story. Which she believes are a 100% true.

My sister also rings me to complain about my mother, I know it hard for her but her ringing me yelling and crying doesn't help.

I don't want to no listener to either but I can't take sides, feeling very stuck in the middle.

My mother has no where else to live but she not happy nor is my sister.

I not able to have my mother live with me.

Feeling guilty I can't help

3 replies

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In response to: Elderly mother

TideisTurningSenior Contributor24 May 2022, 7:36 pm AEST

Re: Elderly mother

Hi @NMDAUGHTER,

Welcome to the Forums. I'm really glad you've found us here 😊 I'm TideisTurning, one of the Peer Support Workers.

That sounds like a really tough situation to navigate, and feeling stuck in the middle sounds like an awful feeling on top of that. I can totally understand feelings of guilt, and possible helplessness too? It can be super tough to sit with when you feel like you need to do something, but don't feel like there's anything you can actually do!

I want to encourage you to reach out for extra support- there is Carer Gateway (1800 422 737) and My Aged Care and Dementia Australia (1800 100 500) may also have some useful information. Take good care of you 🌼

In response to: Elderly mother

Eve7Senior Contributor24 May 2022, 11:08 pm AEST

Re: Elderly mother

Hello @NMDAUGHTER and welcome to the forums where you’ll find lots of kind supportive people.

My mother is 93 and lives with my sister so we have that in common. Mum has no sign of dementia but she wasn’t happy for quite a while when she moved in with my sister. She is much more settled now and her health has improved considerably.

Has your mother been living with your sister very long? It can be very hard with elderly parents especially if they’re unhappy.

I don’t have any quick solutions for you but I’m willing to listen.

Take care

In response to: Re: Elderly mother

NMDAUGHTERNew Contributor25 May 2022, 4:39 pm AEST

Re: Elderly mother

Thank you for taking the time to reply,

Mums been living with my sister for roughly twoyears, moving states just as the lockdown started,.meaning she never made new friends , now she lost her driving license.

Today we talked like nothing was wrong .

So nice to have a safe place to get thing of my chest 🙂

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